Moscow, Russia - The nuptial ceremony has been booked for 1st January 2014 at Moscow's St Basil Fawlty Cathedral in an all-bells-and-whistles ceremony sponsored by top Russian state fracker GazProm.
Thirty year-old former Olympic rhythmic gymnast...
Bloodyvostock - "Think the Incredible Hulk in Alina Kabaeva's body," is how one Kremlin insider put it this morning, "a male rhythmic gymnast so supple and contortable it's a wonder all that spangly lycra never bursts during, er, workouts."
Turginovo, Russia - (Festive Ass Mess): Flanked at a traditional Russian Orthodox midnight mass in Turginovo by the usual entourage of wholesome-looking, corpulent ex-shot put champion babushkas Vladimir Putin looked humble and Pius (sic) XII.
Moscow - (ReUterus & Bolshevik Ass Mess): Arsenal defender Philippe Senderos is hopping mad.
The AC Milan-loaned footballer is the subject of a Moscow newspaper's paternity slur claiming he successfully impregnanted Vladimir Putin's 'special...
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