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Funny satire stories about 2009

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Notable Deaths of 2009

Funny story: Notable Deaths of 2009

Fraternal twins, Hope and Change: Died within months of each other after protracted illnesses. Born prematurely, some years before the Common Era, the twins frequently suffered health problems but both also hit stunning heights during their lifetimes. Hope, always feeble, caught a cold while watching President Obama's marathon 5 hour inaugural parade. Hope never recovered and died in Februar...

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Obama voted best American president of 2009

The American College of Professors Who Teach in a College said that, by far and away, Barack Obama was the best president America had in 2009. Spokesperson for the group Courtney Hurper Smith-Harper said that President Obama clearly showed "mu...

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Although 99% Of Men Say It's "NO!", "Whatever" Polled To Be Most Annoying Word For 2009

Funny story: Although 99% Of Men Say It's "NO!", "Whatever" Polled To Be Most Annoying Word For 2009

According to a new study "Whatever" is the most annoying word but for the 6,000th year in a row, men say that it is "No!" If you're in the US or planning to go there, whatever you do don't use the word "Whatever" stated the article! For some...

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2009 - Zombies Rising...And Rising....

Funny story: 2009 - Zombies Rising...And Rising....

They stink, they're rotting away, they look disgusting, they drool viscose black gunk and nobody in their right mind would ever want to sleep with one. They just aren't sexy. And yet... Zombies have become the darlings of the literary, film, and p...

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2009 To Be The Last Year For Just Over 900 Years To Have Two Zeros In The Middle Of It

Funny story: 2009 To Be The Last Year For Just Over 900 Years To Have Two Zeros In The Middle Of It

"2009 is a great year to be alive!" Those were the immortal words spoken for posterity by First Black US President Barack Obama earlier today during a landmark speech in which he correctly identified that the current year, 2009, will probably be...

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Five Ways to Slay the Beast of 2009

Funny story: Five Ways to Slay the Beast of 2009

January kicks off 2009 with a few depressing issues. Remember that clot Gore and the global warming fiasco of last year? (we're all gonna sweat to death or drown due the melting icecaps) Remember the savings made by not having to fork out for ant...

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Cynics Predict 2009 as Totally Bonkers Year

Funny story: Cynics Predict 2009 as Totally Bonkers Year

Cynics worldwide are predicting 2009 will be the barmiest year in recorded history to date, and there may well be some accuracy to their claim as even leaders of the Church of Perpetual Optimism are agreeing with them. Professor Theobald Headbange...

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1st. Quarter of 2009 extended by 2 weeks

Funny story: 1st. Quarter of 2009 extended by 2 weeks

Following the sucessful extension of 2009 by 1 second to bring clocks into line with the earth's rotation, G.20 the world's top 20 economic powers have decided to extend the 1st quarter of 2009 to April 14th. Economists realised that the 1 second...

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Boris Johnson's New Year's Resolutions 2009

Funny story: Boris Johnson's New Year's Resolutions 2009

Boris Johnson's New Year Resolutions · Have a good haircut · Think of some brand new catchphrases · Gosh · Phwoar · Crikey · Make friends · Stop taking David Cameron seriously · Stop the Congestion Charge · Get better at Wiff Waff · Make proper friends with Barack · Finish my collection of Colloquial poetry · Finish the Dove Cote · Finish War and Peace · Start a War over Badminton...

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Breaking news…

Emmanuel Macron Doesn’t Speak Trumpish

Anyone notice, French President Emmanuel Macron speaks better English than Donald Trump? And no superlatives necessary...Sad!
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