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Funny story:  British PM to freeze the nuts off Roman Abramovich's assets as anti-Putin sanctions start to bite

British PM to freeze the nuts off Roman Abramovich's assets as anti-Putin sanctions start to bite

London - An anti-Putin groundswell is threatening to explode into the murky world of oligarch assets like Roman Abramovich's London gold vaults. On Monday British Prime Minister David Cameron will sign an order for Diplomatic Protection Racket cop...
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Funny story:  You Alright? : Illegal To Repeat

You Alright? : Illegal To Repeat

The greeting "you alright?" has officially been made an illegal response to "you alright?" The response, which has been widely accepted by morons across the country for decades, has now been made an illegal response because it makes no sense due...
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Funny story:  OMG, someone's put a slug in Courtney Stodden's lettuce bikini

OMG, someone's put a slug in Courtney Stodden's lettuce bikini

Washington DC - Something slimy has creeped its way out of Courtney Stodden's Butterhead lettuce bikini during a vegan beauty parade. And nibbled a hole in the Iceberg leaves that barely cover the TV star's 44DD bikini cups. TV cameramen filmi...
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Funny story:  Obama Joins Everyone Else  In Blaming Obama For Everything

Obama Joins Everyone Else In Blaming Obama For Everything

"I blame President Obama for this," said an angry President Obama as traffic snarled on the I-95 just south of D.C. Honking his horn and cursing at other road users the angry President shook his head, "This is his fault, this traffic jam - and this s...
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Funny story:  MacDison Swiss Army Bagpipes sold to U.S. Navy  in $100m deal

MacDison Swiss Army Bagpipes sold to U.S. Navy in $100m deal

MacDison PLC has clinched a $100m contract to supply Swiss Army Bagpipes to the U.S. Navy. The innovative bagpipes include an Egg Boiler, Tyre Inflator, Knife Blade, Letter Opener, Light, Magnifying Glass, Money Clip, Nail File, Pen, Pin, Protractor,...
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Funny story:  JK Rowling Plans Crime Spree

JK Rowling Plans Crime Spree

JK Rowling, whose crime novels written under the pseudonym Robert Galbraith will eventually outnumber her Harry Potter books, has announced that she is planning a crime spree. Our informant "Mick", who generally hangs out at the bus station rubb...
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Funny story:  Grief, Sadness and Then Anger At Tragic Loss of Live Overwhelms Social Media

Grief, Sadness and Then Anger At Tragic Loss of Live Overwhelms Social Media

Social media was a buzz with outpourings of immense grief, a sense of universal loss and then feelings of anger; after it was announced actor James Garner, whose whimsical style in the 1950s TV Western "Maverick" led to a stellar career in TV and fil...
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Funny story:  Former football pundit Alan Hansen appointed as new Defence Secretary

Former football pundit Alan Hansen appointed as new Defence Secretary

Prime Minister David Cameron announced this morning in London that former television pundit and Liverpool defender Alan Hansen has been appointed as the new Secretary of Defence. "Alan has a history of making sure nothing slips past him. That wor...
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Funny story:  Susan Rice Sent to Russia to Assist Putin in Cover-Up of Malaysian Airline Disaster

Susan Rice Sent to Russia to Assist Putin in Cover-Up of Malaysian Airline Disaster

Washington D.C. - Ambassador to the United Nations, Susan Rice, has been dispatched to Russia by President Obama to assist President Putin in his cover-up attempt to hide the damage his soldiers did when they murdered nearly 300 innocent people a...
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Funny story:  Cameron hopes introduction of female ministers in cabinet re-shuffle will finally get Michael Gove laid

Cameron hopes introduction of female ministers in cabinet re-shuffle will finally get Michael Gove laid

Conservative leader David Cameron announced in a press conference on Saturday at number 10 that his introduction of several new female ministers was done with the sole intention of getting former minister for schools Michael Gove laid. Addressing...
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Funny story:  Royal Body language experts determine Prince George will grow to be expert at pooping, crying

Royal Body language experts determine Prince George will grow to be expert at pooping, crying

Only a year old and yet body language experts have already signalled that Prince George will be fantastic at both crying and pooping. "We studied several videos of the young prince and surprisingly he showed a real interest in crying his head off...
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Funny story:  Putin's Spin Doctors Taking Anti Spin Drugs Due To Dizziness

Putin's Spin Doctors Taking Anti Spin Drugs Due To Dizziness

Vlad The Cad's spin doctors are in such a dizzy state due to recent Russian Government problems that they are prescribing each other anti-spin pills. International esteem has lately been hanging out of the window for the beleaguered country. "My...
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Funny story:  Manchester United still number one

Manchester United still number one

Five o'clock in the afternoon every weekday is an important time for any football fan. As the closing bell rings in London's Stock Exchange, they rush home to look up their team and see how they have fared in the day's trading. This week Manchester U...
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Funny story:  'Some ass radicalised him' as suicide donkey wreaks Gaza havoc

'Some ass radicalised him' as suicide donkey wreaks Gaza havoc

Palestine - Mossad is hunting a gang of radicalised drug mules that strapped a bomb belt onto a three year-old donkey that blew up in the Rafah area of the Gaza Strip today. Israeli bomb squad farces said they used a frozen lollipop to lure the b...
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Funny story:  Lindsay Lohan Threatens Comeback

Lindsay Lohan Threatens Comeback

Fabulous actress Lindsay Lohan has announced she's back and never felt better. The one time popular DJ was speaking at an award ceremony where she won the Ischia Comeback Award for her performance in the West End production of David Mamet's play '...
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Funny story:  Kanye Heads South With North West

Kanye Heads South With North West

Popular Hip-Hop superstar Kanye West has just gone South to Mexico with his daughter North. His famous partner Kim Kardashian went as well because there's always an opportunity for a photo shoot and she loves a good pose does our Kim. Speaking...
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Funny story:  A healthy way to lose weight? Fat chance!

A healthy way to lose weight? Fat chance!

There was uproar last night when it was revealed that receipts from supermarkets are now to contain health warnings for the shopper if their choices are deemed to be unhealthy. There have been accusations that this is just the latest example of the n...
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Funny story:  Creationist Scientists Say Big Bang Happened 5,000 Years Ago

Creationist Scientists Say Big Bang Happened 5,000 Years Ago

Xanadu The Creationist Scientist League announced during their annual convention today that they have come to an agreement that the Big Bang actually did occur, but it was actually just 5,000 years ago and resulted in a big garden with a couple of tr...
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Showing page 3 (of 5,021 pages)
Breaking News...

Microwave Attachment Eliminates Need For Head Shaving

Hyram B. Dison's invention, which eliminates daily head shaving, is now on sale. "Microcaps" use a microwave to defoliate scalps with a rubber skull attachment similar to ones used in electric chairs.

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