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Funny story: Sir Alec Fergieson agrees to manage England for 2014 World Cup

Sir Alec Fergieson agrees to manage England for 2014 World Cup

Newly retired Sir Alec Fergieson has revealed in his new book he turned down the chance to manage England twice but, if asked for a third time, would definitely accept the job... with conditions. Fergie revealed he turned down the chance to replac...
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Funny story: Scotland to be as crap at athletics as it is at football by 2016 Olympics, say Yes campaign

Scotland to be as crap at athletics as it is at football by 2016 Olympics, say Yes campaign

An independent Scotland must be given the chance to fly away from Brazil in 2016 with their heads held high, which is easy to do if your head is not weighed down with a heavy gold medal round your neck, said a man on Twitter yesterday. "Scotland m...
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Funny story: Syria Cancels Plans To Invade Scotland

Syria Cancels Plans To Invade Scotland

DAMASCUS, Syria - Word coming out of the Syrian Desert is that the Syrian government has decided to cancel its planned invasion of Scotland. A spokesperson for the Syrian government Yamadin Hashiki, 40, stated that after going over the financial s...
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Funny story: England win over Scotland is 'actually a defeat' say critics

England win over Scotland is 'actually a defeat' say critics

The England football teams controversial 3-2 win over auld enemies Scotchland is to be investigated by the FA and FIFA, after various overpaid journalists, broadcasters and ex-players pointed out that the overpaid over-pampered players of the English...
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Funny story: Cameron Immigration Crackdown

Cameron Immigration Crackdown

PM David Cameron last night warned of the dangers of unchecked immigration and erosion of the English way of life. Society Speaking at a BNP rally he said "I'm not talking about the Polish plumber that wants to come here, nick our jobs and shaf...
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Funny story: Glasgow Kiss For UKIP

Glasgow Kiss For UKIP

Nigel Farrago was having a rethink over his Gay Marriage policy after receiving a Glasgow Kiss in Scotland. Blinded with emotion he declared: 'My welcome here has moved me considerably and in honour of my Scottish pals I've decided to break with t...
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Funny story: Haggis Arrested Following Robbery

Haggis Arrested Following Robbery

Coppers have rounded up a runaway gang of vagrant haggis bank robbers in the highlands. The haggis, of which there were eighteen, were found running around in circles in a swamp on Glen Regis with a sack full of Swiss bank notes and a barrel of b...
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Funny story: Nina Dobrev Scoffs At The Tom Cruise Rumors

Nina Dobrev Scoffs At The Tom Cruise Rumors

REDONDO BEACH, California - Nina Dobrev has stated that she enjoys starring in The Vampire Diaries so much she would almost do it for free. But of course her agent and personal manager both have other opinions. Nina, 24, has been involved in a...
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Funny story: Prince Harry to be new face of TV Burp

Prince Harry to be new face of TV Burp

Following a successful stint on Comic Relief making impoverished africans laugh, the normally half-naked Prince Harry is to audition for the part of Harry Hill on ITVs successful tea-time comedy TV Burp. Harry, who describes himself on twitter as...
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Funny story: Scottish FA To Consider Removing Saltire From Jerseys

Scottish FA To Consider Removing Saltire From Jerseys

After the Grampian Fire and Rescue Service (GFRS) chiefs removed Saltires from the grill of two fire appliances following complaints that they were offensive, Scottish football bosses are set to consider taking a similar stance with the national team...
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Funny story: Bears WR tells Scottish reporter about Viagra use in the NFL

Bears WR tells Scottish reporter about Viagra use in the NFL

CHICAGO, Illinois (ABSNN) - "They test NFL players for performance enhancement drugs (PED's), but what they're looking for is steroids, not male enhancement drugs such as Viagra. They can stop us from bulking up, but not from getting laid," said Chi...
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Funny story: Quentin Kelp MP - A Drop of Scotch

Quentin Kelp MP - A Drop of Scotch

Dear Constituents I had a very hectic weekend, utterly spoilt by my wife insisting I attend the wedding of her niece to a man who hails from Edinburgh. As we all know, Scots are well known for being careful with their money but how low they can stoop was brought home to me when I was given a handful of confetti to throw. It was dirty. Whilst I waited in the car for the reception to f...
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Funny story: Salmond Accepts Defeat in Scottish Referendum Negotiations

Salmond Accepts Defeat in Scottish Referendum Negotiations

A deal setting out terms for a Scottish independence referendum was signed today by Prime Minister David Cameron and First Minister Alex Salmond. The settlement followed months of hard negotiations in which Mr. Salmond was finally forced to accept w...
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Funny story: Scots - The mothers of invention?

Scots - The mothers of invention?

Following last weeks extraordinary revelations made by Sean Connery and Alex Ferguson that the Scots invented the world and the wind, during their love-in with Andy Murray, we asked you yesterday how much you know about Scottish inventions? Here are the answers. How did you do?? Anaesthetics. TRUE Most doctors are Scots and still employ the technique of putting patients to sleep by droning...
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Funny story: Football Gossip - WORLD CUP QUALIFYING September 2012

Football Gossip - WORLD CUP QUALIFYING September 2012

Moldova 0 England 5 Moldova were rolled over by The Three Lions. Two goals from Frank Lampard, one from Jermaine Defoe and first international strikes from James Milner and Leighton Baines. I think even Leyton Orient might have scored against Moldova. Scotland 0 Serbia 0 Manager Craig Levein told the press conference he believed that his team could win all 10 qualifying games. He was wrong.
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Funny story: New explanation for the Pennines

New explanation for the Pennines

A controversial new theory has been unveiled to provide a new reason for the Pennines, the range of hills in the UK that are home to - at any one time - three thousand lost ramblers. The mainstream theory is that Scotland banged into England, and...
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Funny story: Former PM Gordon Brown Timed At Edinburgh Running Faster Than Usain Bolt!

Former PM Gordon Brown Timed At Edinburgh Running Faster Than Usain Bolt!

Following Monday's sprint onto the stage by former Prime Minister Gordon Brown to speak against Scottish independence at the International book festival in Edinburgh, Mr Brown said today that he would only consider running for gold at the 2016 Olympi...
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Funny story: Football Results & comments 15th August 2012

Football Results & comments 15th August 2012

International Friendlies England 2 Italy 1 England gained revenge for their Euro 2012 with a victory over the Azurri. The match was played in the Wankdorf Stadium in Berne, Switzerland. With a stadium name like that it's a surprise Wayne Rooney and John Terry weren't in the squad. Scotland 3 Australia 1 The Scots beat the mighty Australians to move up to 3rd in the Cricket World Rankings.
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Showing page 3 (of 20 pages)
Breaking News...

Kelly Carlin Revises George Carlin's List of Words You Can't Say on TV

George Carlin's only daughter, Kelly Carlin, has updated her father's famous list of the "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television".
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