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Bannon Calls for Boycott of Pledge of Allegiance

The boycott of the National Anthem by some NFL players has gained an unexpected ally. Steve Bannon, formerly of the White House staff and once again head of Breitbart News, announced today that he would no longer participate in recital of the Pledge...

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Moon Severely Damaged by Total Solar Eclipse

Mt. Palomar Observatory. Astronomers today confirmed what amateur moon gazers have been saying since late August: the moon is noticeably paler than it was before the total solar eclipse of Aug. 21. Offering an explanation devoid of scientific jargon...

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Puerto Rico Secedes from U. S., Annexes to Spain

San Juan, Puerto Rico.Angered by the catastrophic failure of the United States to provide immediate aid to his hurricane-ravaged territory, Gov. Ricardo Rossello today announced that Puerto Rico's territorial legislature had voted overwhelmingly to s...

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McCain 'No' Vote Explained; Brainwashed as POW

Speaking on condition of anonymity, CIA psychiatrists speculated that John McCain's decision to vote 'no' on the Republican Graham/Cassidy health bill was the result of subtle brainwashing during his extended confinement as a prisoner of war in North...

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Explore Louisiana? Why?

Ignoring common sense and the United State constitution, President Thomas Jefferson recently diverted 15 million of your hard-earned tax dollars to buy less than a million square miles of uninhabitable desert, unplowable arid plains and impenetrable...

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Charles Osgood's Oliveti Navy Bean Radio Commercial

Beantown, U. S. A. In an obvious parody of a long-running radio commercial for a private, religious-oriented university, Oliveti Navy Bean Inc., the nation's largest distributor of that specialty product, released a new radio commercial today, voice...

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Trump to seek Re-election as Democrat in 2020?

Sources close to Senate Democratic leader Chuck Schumer revealed, under promise of anonymity, that the whopping deal between President Donald Trump, House minority leader Nancy Pelosi and Schumer in mid-week contained a secret agreement regarding Tru...

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Salmon to Boycott misnamed "Fall Fish Festival"

The annual run of Kokanee salmon up Lake Tahoe's Taylor Creel to the spawning beds may not occur this October. Reports from fishermen indicate Tahoe's Kokanee salmon can be found only in small numbers at the south end of the lake. Where have all the...

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Obama's Secret Pardons: Benedict Arnold, Philip Nolan

Washington, D. C. Seven months after then President Barack Obama commuted the sentence of WikiLeaks informant Chelsea Manning, documents have surfaced indicating Obama planned to posthumously pardon two infamous American military officers from anothe...

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Obit: Film Great SHrdlu dead at 89

Hollywood today mourned the passing of Slovenian-born Sachislav Hrdlu, 89, one of the film industry's most versatile members. Hrdlu, who retired at the peak of his career sixty years ago, died in his sleep last night at the Motion Picture Academy Hom...

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Trump's secret plan to restart draft

Not mentioned in President Donald Trump's televised speech to the nation announcing a stepped up war in Afghanistan was his secret plan to restart the draft. This time, with approval from a willing Republican majority in congress, women will be requi...

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Sex and the Total Solar Eclipse

In a study to be released on Tuesday, Aug. 22, and simultaneously published in the Journal of the American Medical Association, the Harvard Institute on Human Sexuality will report that children conceived during the maximum point in a total solar ecl...

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Alt-Left's Walgreens Boycott Ends

BERKELEY, CA. A short-lived, nationwide boycott of Walgreens drugstores ended abruptly today when a spokeswoman for the Alt-Left unexpectedly entered the local Walgreens and publicly apologized to a flabbergasted manager. The embargo, spotty at be...

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Trump's 'Plumbers' Seek Source of White House Leak

WEEKEND WHITE HOUSE, BEDMINSTER, N.J. In what appears to be a throwback to the days of Watergate, President Donald Trump has reportedly organized a band of so-called plumbers to investigate serious leaks at the White House. Anonymous confidential in...

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What eclipse? "The Great Solar Eclipse Hoax of 2017"

In an interview today on Fox News, a spokesman for Eclipse Deniers charged that the highly touted solar eclipse set for Aug. 21 is nothing more than a scam hatched by a coalition of transportation, hotel, resort and food service interests. "Ther...

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It's OK to Shoot Bald Eagles

Only days after the Yellowstone Grizzly Bear lost its place on the endangered species list, Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke today removed the American Bald Eagle from the Fish and Wildlife Service's list. Environmentalists immediately file notice of in...

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Queen Isabella Launches 'Mission to Mars'

June 27, 1492 TO THE EDITOR, BARCELONA SPOOF Dear Editor: At the risk of having my head lopped off I think someone has to demand from her royal majesty an explanation for the ridiculous voyage to China that she has just approved and which depa...

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An Unassuming Proposition: Teach Gangs to Shoot Straight

The near-fatal shooting of a small child in Compton last week, hit by a stray bullet intended for someone else, was only the most recent in a long list of similar unintentional shootings of innocent victims. This nation has had more than enough fune...

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Breaking news…

Emmanuel Macron Doesn’t Speak Trumpish

Anyone notice, French President Emmanuel Macron speaks better English than Donald Trump? And no superlatives necessary...Sad!
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