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Whale activist boat rammed by whale pod sinks

Funny story: Whale activist boat rammed by whale pod sinks

A whaling activist group has been dealt a heavy blow after a pod of whales rammed their boat 'Drew Carey' in South American seas this afternoon. The boat sank immediately with the loss of all hands on board. The Drew Carey had been tailing the Ja...

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Whales Suffer From Sunburn - And They Need Shades

Funny story: Whales Suffer From Sunburn - And They Need Shades

Sunglasses manufacturers are urgently seeking talks with a team of scientists working on the effects sun on whales. The Sun's rays can "burn" whales' skin, just like they can damage human skin, according to the researchers. The scientists stud...

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Stuxnet sonar horror blamed for death of 33 pilot whales

Funny story: Stuxnet sonar horror blamed for death of 33 pilot whales

Rutland Island, Burtonport - (Malware): The cybervirus that sank HMS Preposterous the other week has now claimed another scalp - 33 pilot whale nursing mothers and their young. Their lifeless corpses were washed ashore off the Scottish coast this...

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Animal Rights Angry Over Kirstie Alley's New Whaleskin Dress!

Funny story: Animal Rights Angry Over Kirstie Alley's New Whaleskin Dress!

Animal rights groups are protesting the latest dress made especially for hefty actress Kirstie Alley which is made entirely from whale skin. "I'm not out to offend anyone", stated Ms. Alley. "I figured that if Lady Gaga can wear a meat dress, I ca...

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Japanese Whalers Use Kittens As Chum

Funny story: Japanese Whalers Use Kittens As Chum

As activist's approached a Japanese whaling vessel, the crew was stunned at what they saw: Poor innocent kittens attached to commercial grade hooks to entice whales. "These whalers have really stepped over the line!" said an angry protester nam...

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A giant pile of floating whale feces turns out to be Gary Coleman

The Los Angeles Police Department confirmed today the identity to be that of Different Strokes star Gary Coleman, 42, and is considering his death an intercranial hemorrhage. For days local residence thought Gary Coleman was actually the fecal rem...

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Grey Whales Fleeing Pacific Slaughter for Israel's Promised Water

Funny story: Grey Whales Fleeing Pacific Slaughter for Israel's Promised Water

JERUSALEM - The appearance of a grey whale off the coast of Israel has stunned scientists, in what was thought to be the first time the giant mammal has been seen outside the Pacific in several hundred years. The whale, which was first sighted off...

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Whales peace plan set to sink or swim

Funny story: Whales peace plan set to sink or swim

A proposal aimed at bridging the split between whales and sharks will almost certainly come to King Neptune for a decision this year. Sources say it could involve sharks accepting quotas below current levels; but Iceland is opposing proposed catch...

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Japan to cut whale quota

Funny story: Japan to cut whale quota

A surprise declaration by the International Whaling Commission, issued today, states that Japan has agreed to halve its whaling quota next year. The statement was confirmed by the Japaneses Sushi Minister, Mr Eetsa Lotafish, who said "Japan is sen...

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Killer Whales to be charged with Murder in future

Funny story: Killer Whales to be charged with Murder in future

Killer Whales or Orca's have to be charged with murder in future when they kill. The main problem is how to orchestrate the situation once they have committed the crime.Do we build bigger prisons and if we have a lot of Killer Whales charged with mur...

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Prince of Whales eaten In Japan

Funny story: Prince of Whales eaten In Japan

SeaWorld in Florida has reopened only days after a trainer was killed by a killer whale in front of the audience. There were around 2,000 people at yesterdays performance applauding and cheering as the whales moved round the tank. The whale train...

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Sea World to Use Dentures for Killer Whales

Funny story: Sea World to Use Dentures for Killer Whales

Speedo, Florida - Sea World officials announced today that all killer whales in their possession would have their real teeth removed and be fitted for dentures. The dentures would be removed for working with trainers to prevent them from eating them.

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Killer Whales a menace; impossible to detect say scientists

Funny story: Killer Whales a menace; impossible to detect say scientists

In an emergency session, after yet one more atrocity committed by killer whales, the Society for Human Association with Mammals from Under the Sea.(SHAMUS) announced: "Lurking anywhere from the open ocean to indoor lap and kiddie pools, the whale fa...

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Scientists in a rush to rename Killer Whales

Funny story: Scientists in a rush to rename Killer Whales

Stunned by this week's whale vs. human drowning at a Florida tourist attraction, U.S. zoologists are convening a hastily thrown together symposium in order to focus on the problem. Dr. Lloyd Flembey, acting director of Florida's "Dolphin World Aqu...

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Nature. Watch out!

Funny story: Nature. Watch out!

Spring came early to Windermere this year when a pod of killer whales was spotted worrying a local rower. "I was walking Margaret, that's my dog - my wife's name is Hilda - along the towpath when I heard them singing," enthused keen naturist Richa...

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Killer Whale Called Gordon Attacks Trainer Called Tony

Funny story: Killer Whale Called Gordon Attacks Trainer Called Tony

A killer whale called Gordon has attacked his trainer at Westminster's Seaworld. The trainer was dragged down to the very depths, just like everyone else in the country. There are rumours that Gordon had been threatening to attack for some time. G...

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Killer Whale Does What It's Supposed To Do - Kills Trainer

Funny story: Killer Whale Does What It's Supposed To Do - Kills Trainer

A killer whale has acted precisely as it should, and killed a 40-year-old female trainer at the SeaWorld marine park in Orlando, Florida. Officials described the incident as an accident, saying the woman fell in the water, but witnesses have claim...

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Man With World's Largest Penis Fails Ultimate Test

Funny story: Man With World's Largest Penis Fails Ultimate Test

Everything was set firmly in place, as with military precision, the 'Man With The World's Largest Penis' Bargis Tryhol, accompanied by legendary French marine biologist, Jacques Cocktail and a posse of submarine cameramen set out aboard the yacht 'Co...

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Breaking news…

National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque

"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
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