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Rooney's Regret at Snubbing Original Hair Follicles

Funny story: Rooney's Regret at Snubbing Original Hair Follicles

Wayne Rooney has spoken for the first time about the emotional decision to effectively give up on his original hair follicles and have a hair transplant. Speaking to upmarket newspaper The Completely-Dependent, the Manchester United player admitte...

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Transfer Window: Jimmy Greaves comes out of retirement

Funny story: Transfer Window: Jimmy Greaves comes out of retirement

78 year old former England, Milan, West Ham, Chelsea and Tottenham player has announced he is coming out of retirement. The east-ender, most famous for missing the 1966 world cup final, alcoholism problems and his tv programme with Ian St John, to...

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Man United target replacement for Wayne Rooney

Funny story: Man United target replacement for Wayne Rooney

Manchester United boss David Moyes is planning ahead to the next transfer window and has targeted a replacement for Wayne Rooney in the shape of David Mooney. Mooney plays for Leyton Orient, so far top of League One with five wins from five. Moone...

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Man United v Chelsea: Rooney swaps teams at half-time

Funny story: Man United v Chelsea: Rooney swaps teams at half-time

Dwayne Rodney finally got his wish of a transfer away from the Manc'ester devils last night - although he didn't move far - only to the away team dressing room as Marmitechester United hosted Chelsea in the first Monday night 'classico' of the season...

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England win over Scotland is 'actually a defeat' say critics

Funny story: England win over Scotland is 'actually a defeat' say critics

The England football teams controversial 3-2 win over auld enemies Scotchland is to be investigated by the FA and FIFA, after various overpaid journalists, broadcasters and ex-players pointed out that the overpaid over-pampered players of the English...

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Voodoo curse holds up transfers on Premier League big potatoes

Funny story: Voodoo curse holds up transfers on Premier League big potatoes

Former Norwich, Wimbledon and England forward John Fashanu today sensationally claimed he had met a witch-doctor who has cursed the Premier League and is blocking the transfers of four big named players. Fashanu, who is currently working in a butc...

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David Moyes admits he forgot he was Man United boss

Funny story: David Moyes admits he forgot he was Man United boss

Football fans around the world were aghast this morning on the eve of opening weekend of the Premier League (EPL) as David Moyes admitted to a reporter that he had forgotten he was the new at Old Trafford and thought he was still in charge at Everto...

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Rooney To Ferriby

The most sensational transfer of 2013 has finally been given the green light. Wayne Rooney will leave thirteen time Premier League champions Manchester United for a all new challenge. North Ferriby United's new owner Sheik Hamu Abu Sabu Abu has pledg...

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Rooney Retires!

Funny story: Rooney Retires!

Wayne Rooney has hungs his boots on the nail and hammered them into his coffin, he's retiring! Dear Wayne has had enough of training, playing, sweating, taking the piss out of United fans literally, and earning 250.000,00 quid a week plus sponsor bon...

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Wayne Rooney confirmed with rabies in Montenegro!

Funny story: Wayne Rooney confirmed with rabies in Montenegro!

Wayne Rooney has been diagnosed with rabies after foaming at the mouth during a training session before tonights very important game against Montenegro. A stray dog was warming up when it suddenly took a bit out of Rooney's rear end and thinking n...

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Wayne Rooney Suffers Choking Embarrassment

Funny story: Wayne Rooney Suffers Choking Embarrassment

Manchester United and England star Wayne Rooney is facing a night in hospital after choking on a dismantled Rubik's Cube at his Cheshire home. Speaking from outside the People's Dispensary for Sick Animals (PDSA) in Warrington where Rooney is recu...

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England Football team drop Umbro

Funny story: England Football team drop Umbro

England are to end their long association with Umbro in favor of Umbro's parent company Nike. The move comes in the wake of negative press for Umbro whose recent kits have been seen as rubbish. A spokesman said. "The last couple of kits that Umbro...

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Usain Bolt signs for United and Rooney sprints the other way!

Funny story: Usain Bolt signs for United and Rooney sprints the other way!

Sir Alex Ferguson has made the scoop of the season and offered super-sprinter, Usain Bolt, a contract to play for Man United! Bolt, who is totally insane, feels that his speed can benefit United who tend to be pretty slow in the final third (whatever...

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Football Gossip & comments 2nd September 2012

Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 2nd September 2012

Liverpool midfielder Jonjo Shelvey, 20, whose grandmother is from Edinburgh, has held talks with the SFA about potentially representing Scotland. (Sunday Mirror) "See you Jimmy, I mean Jonjo" England manager Roy Hodgson insists he will stick with veterans Frank Lampard, Steven Gerrard and John Terry. Lampard, 34, Gerrard, 32, and Terry, 31, will not be discarded as they enter their 30s. (Dai...

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Man Utd to represent Holland at the next World Cup!

Funny story: Man Utd to represent Holland at the next World Cup!

After the sensational signing of Robin van Persie the Dutch Footbal Organisation called, KNVB, have requested that Manchester United represent them in the coming World Cup qualification games and if they qualify, in Brazil in two years. The Dutch...

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Halifax Town sign Wayne Rooney

Funny story: Halifax Town sign Wayne Rooney

Conference North side, Halifax Town, have shocked the football world by signing former Premiership and England striker, Wayne Rooney. "It was a chance encounter," said Halifax chairman, Dave Breastcost. "I'd been hanging around his local pub for e...

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Euro 2012: Englands Jermaine Defoe to change name by deed poll

Funny story: Euro 2012: Englands Jermaine Defoe to change name by deed poll

As the only recognised striker not to get a chance in Roy Hodgsons England Euro 2012 squad, Jermaine Defoe has decided on drastic action to push his way into the bosses plans for the forthcoming world cup fixtures. When Defoe arrives back in Engla...

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Euro 2012: England prepare to fly home after Italy defeat

Funny story: Euro 2012: England prepare to fly home after Italy defeat

England players are today packing their suitcases and preparing to fly back home after the 4-2 penalty defeat to Italy last night. Ashley Cole and Ashley Young who both missed their crucial kicks, have already been offered a pizza advert, followin...

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Breaking news…

Putin Hacked The Emmys

NBC, ABC, and CBS all claim that Russian President Putin hacked the Emmy Award computers, to explain how unknown, barely-viewed shows on Netflix and HBO could win so many awards.
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