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Congress Declares Global War on 'The Heebie-Jeebies'

WASHINGTON-On Monday, the U.S. Congress unanimously approved the Authorization for Use of Force against Unpleasant Lifeforms (AUFUL) joint resolution, effectively declaring war on what the Obama administration calls "the heebie-jeebies." After si...

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Jimmy Carter: 'My own communications are probably monitored'

Funny story: Jimmy Carter: 'My own communications are probably monitored'

"We have become a nation of spie,s which is sad", says the former President. Carter went on to tell the press that there among their own group is at least one spy taking down everything he was saying and which of them were nodding their heads in a...

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Obama Delays Daylight Savings Time Until 2017

Funny story: Obama Delays Daylight Savings Time Until 2017

Washington,D.C.-The Obama administration announced today that President Obama has signed an executive order delaying the start of Daylight Savings Time until after the elections in 2016. The move, which was widely anticipated, comes on the heels...

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Barack Obama signs law that stops actors from playing more than one Superhero on screen

Funny story: Barack Obama signs law that stops actors from playing more than one Superhero on screen

It was a momentous day in Washington as President Barack Obama put the finishing touches on a new bill that prevents Hollywood actors from playing more than one superhero on film. The President had been promising laws regulating actors and their por...

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Police May Use Military Conscious Spray (U-24) on Criminals

Funny story: Police May Use Military Conscious Spray (U-24) on Criminals

New York City has asked authorities in Washington DC about the use of U-24 spray used by our military. This spray would certainly result in fewer deaths and injuries so why can't it be used on criminals or to disrupt crowds, NYC cops wish to know.

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North Korea to start drone testing, partners with Brookstone

Pyongyang, North Korea - Supreme leader Kim Jong-Un continues his threats towards the western world as North Korea has just announced it will begin drone testing for military use. In an undisclosed deal with US retailer Brookstone, North Korean plans...

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Nancy Pelosi Does Not Take Baths

Funny story: Nancy Pelosi Does Not Take Baths

GOP Nemesis Nancy Pelosi does not take baths according to a hacked NHS spy recording. Why? "We're still listening", says reporter. Nancy Patricia D'Alesandro Pelosi, elected Democratic Leader by House Democrats and therefore the Minority Leader...

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US Congress Unanimously Passes 'Days of the Week' Bill

Funny story: US Congress Unanimously Passes 'Days of the Week' Bill

In unparalleled precedence, the US Congress passed the dubious 'Days of the Week' bill by a unanimous vote, the first such occurrence in the short history of the 113th Do-Nothing Congress. So thrilled were all 535 members at the outcome, that they h...

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Uproar in the Washington Senate.

Funny story: Uproar in the Washington Senate.

Washington: Senator Paddy O'Hare of Massachusetts was yesterday bundled out of a debate in the Senate on additional funding to be made to contain rogue states such as Syria from using chemical weapons. Uproar broke out when O'Hare was invited by the...

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Here Comes "Hyper-Removal"

Funny story: Here Comes "Hyper-Removal"

The US Government on advice from the CIA have coined a new word 'HYPER-REMOVAL". CIA Director Kant Giffafuck said: "The word is a sister of "Overkill" which is now common parlance and has more or less the same work to do. We have ordered our PR Agenc...

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Washington DC Overrun By Rats!

Funny story: Washington DC Overrun By Rats!

When a member of the United States Senate screamed her head off "I just got bit by a rat!" during a speech yesterday, it became obvious to all that the rat problem in Washington DC was totally out of control. Apparently, the Washington shutdown ha...

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Ruling Authority to Re-Institute HUAC, Cites New "Red Scare"

In light of attempts to dismantle the United States government by "red district" congressmen and dangerous outside groups, the R.A. plans to bring back the House Un-American Activities Committee. The earlier Committee, formed to investigate so-cal...

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USA Government Walks, That's Quitting Your Job According To American Citizens.

Funny story: USA Government Walks, That's Quitting Your Job According To American Citizens.

People that point out things have gotten together and decided this, "American Government Stays Away from Work", thing constitutes a breech in the constituent/supporter agreement. Citizen have concluded that, if they walk off their jobs their bosses consider that quitting. You will get fired as well. So in the spirit of these observations we, the voting citizens of America are accepting all...

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America closes down for October

Funny story: America closes down for October

America is closed. This is the main headline dominating the world today. All government websites have closed, allowing America's Most Wanted to travel about unnoticed. Whilst the world is interested, they would only get worried if Facebook and Tw...

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Obama Abolishes Congress, Will Rule by Executive Order

Funny story: Obama Abolishes Congress, Will Rule by Executive Order

The White House announced today that President Obama has issued an order suspending the representative branch of government. "The Congress is clearly not listening to reason or logic," the President said angrily, "and the Executive Branch cannot per...

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The U.S. Congress May Be Filing A Lawsuit Against The Washington Redskins

Funny story: The U.S. Congress May Be Filing A Lawsuit Against The Washington Redskins

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Congress has issued a statement that they are fed up with the tens of thousands of complaints they are receiving regarding the name of the NFL's Washington Redskins. Congressman Tom Udall of New Mexico stated t...

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Congrressional Scheduling Conflicted

Since the U.S. Congress has been in recess through the month of August and will be in session for only nine days in September, the leadership is having difficulties in finding a time slot to fit in what President Obama considers a time sensitive issu...

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Rogue NSA agent blows whistle on game-playing politicians

Funny story: Rogue NSA agent blows whistle on game-playing politicians

A new whistleblower from Booz Allen Hamilton has emerged to offer insights into game-playing habits of congressional leaders. This development occurred yesterday after Senator McCain was caught playing poker on his iPhone during a three and a hal...

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The Queen Takes A Knee

The Queen of England takes a knee in front of Trump during the playing of the Stars Spangle Banner, joining the protest.
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