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Subway and Starbucks open branches on Death Row

Funny story: Subway and Starbucks open branches on Death Row

Two of the world's largest brands have opened branches inside Death Row at New York State Penitentiary to serve last meals and drinks to the inmates before they go for the needle. "It's a bold move," said Subway chairman, Simon Simple. "We believe...

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New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

Funny story: New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

Residents of New York City's Union Square area were delighted when a new Starbucks store opened up inside Union Square's already-existing Starbucks. Sean Kingsley, a graduate film student at nearby New York University, said that the opening of the...

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Starbucks Proves Extremely Helpful to Amnesia Victim

Funny story: Starbucks Proves Extremely Helpful to Amnesia Victim

When Joseph Brittingham was attacked and beaten by armed robbers in his Upper West Side apartment late one Saturday night in November of 2008, he sustained multiple concussions so severe that it was questionable whether he'd even survive, let alone regain his previous mental and physical abilities. After over two years of intensive care and ongoing, excruciating physical rehabilitation, Joseph...

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Starbucks to Expand Into Every Home and Workplace

SEATTLE - Starbucks, the world's biggest coffee people, will expand into the home. "Studies," said a spokesman, "have shown that after a Starbucks - registered trademark - they go to a 'home' or a 'work'. These people spend nearly most of their da...

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iPad 2 Rumors - Starbucks App Coffee Dispenser

Funny story: iPad 2 Rumors - Starbucks App Coffee Dispenser

Leading on from this morning's news over on Mashable that the next iPhone and iPad will have a Dual-Core Graphics Chip, we have had confirmation that the new iPad will incorporate a coffee dispenser for use with the iPad Starbucks app. Fanbois wil...

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Lure of Missile Defence Contract Prompts Starbucks To Remove "Coffee" From Logo

Funny story: Lure of Missile Defence Contract Prompts Starbucks To Remove "Coffee" From Logo

Starbucks, the world's largest coffee maker has dropped its name and the word "coffee" from its ubiquitous cups. This seemingly suicidal move is allegedly only one in a long line of moves that are being made to enable the coffee maker to "move up the...

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Future News: McDonald's Buys FDA

Funny story: Future News: McDonald's Buys FDA

(Published 2027) - WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a landmark takeover, fast food/media giant McDonald's-Disney bought out the Food and Drugs Administration. "It makes me feel very sad," said Republican, Ted Electronic Arts Gareth. "In a Starbucks kinda St...

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Jon Gosselin Gets Job at Starbucks

Funny story: Jon Gosselin Gets Job at Starbucks

Hollywood - Jon Gosselin got a job at Starbucks to help for gifts for his eight children. "Reality television was nice, and paid a lot of money, but without a reality show to fall back on, well, I needed to raise some extra cash." Jon Gosselin to...

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Starbucks Decides Its Too Successful, Launches Plan That Will Destroy Them.

Funny story: Starbucks Decides Its Too Successful, Launches Plan That Will Destroy Them.

After spending each day of their lives with a stopwatch stuck up their ass by management, Starbucks has ordered its barristas to slow down. Can a company as big as Starbucks F--k up this bad? In 1985, The Coca-Cola Company replaced the original fo...

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Pete Carroll Announces That He Is Quitting USC To Take Seattle Seahawks Head Coaching Job

Funny story: Pete Carroll Announces That He Is Quitting USC To Take Seattle Seahawks Head Coaching Job

On the day after the BCS Title Game, Southern Cal head coach Pete Carroll announced that he is resigning his position to take the same job with the Seattle Seahawks of the NFL. The USC coach has been to BCS games seven of the previous eight seasons...

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Starbucks Town Opens In Hampshire

Funny story: Starbucks Town Opens In Hampshire

Today an entire new town made up of Starbucks shops opened in Hampshire. The town - cleverly named St. Arbucks - stands on the rivers Dye and Yewretick, and is simply street after street of the coffee shops. Local branch(es) manager, Maxwell House...

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Starbucks' business may have bottomed

Funny story: Starbucks' business may have bottomed

A top executive explained that Starbucks' business had become as black and burnt out as the sludge at the bottom of a cup that's been left up on a commuter's dashboard in the sun all weekend. He further added that dealing with the many store clo...

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Starbucks save the planet

Funny story: Starbucks save the planet

In a leaked memo last week it was revealed that every Starbucks in the UK leaves a tap running constantly in the kitchen. Mocka Chinolatty, head of Starbucks, on hearing the news, instantly interrupted one press conference on Minimum Wage From Tip...

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Starbucks to close 600 stores to leave space for milk

Funny story: Starbucks to close 600 stores to leave space for milk

Starbucks, the Seattle based coffee house chain has announced it will close 600 stores and axe 12,000 staff in an effort to leave more room for milk.

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After Baristas win $100 Million Dollar judgment, Starbucks says: "It's Gas, Grass or Ass from now Onward. No body rides for free."

Funny story: After Baristas win $100 Million Dollar judgment, Starbucks says: "It's Gas, Grass or Ass from now Onward. No body rides for free."

Seattle, Washington - Starbuck's business practice of letting shift supervisors dip their hands into the baristas tip jar, allowing them to split it instead properly compensating them from its coffers of corporate profits was challenged in a cour...

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Starbucks Coffee Can Cure Tuberculosis

Funny story: Starbucks Coffee Can Cure Tuberculosis

Mephistophel, Tennessee (IP) Scientists working at the Tuberculosis Institutre in Mephistophel, Tennessee have announced that Starbucks coffee can cure tuberculosis (TB).

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Starbucks to serve greasy sausage links, salty fries and cheep plastic kids toys

Funny story: Starbucks to serve greasy sausage links, salty fries and cheep plastic kids toys

Seattle, Washington - In response to McDonalds announcement that it has changed it menu for the first time in 30 years to include free Wi-Fi Internet access and over rated gourmet coffee, Starbucks also announced changes to its own menu as well. Star...

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Plucky Pensioner Discovers Hitler In His Local Starbucks

Funny story: Plucky Pensioner Discovers Hitler In His Local Starbucks

That's how the cookie crumbles. How often have we heard that saying? Well for Pensioner, Robert Dillsprong, the cookie certainly crumbled in a rather strange way indeed. Robert takes up the tale:...

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Fake Friend

Surprise, surprise! Apparently, Omarosa was Trump’s fake friend. This is definitely sad.
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