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Republicans suggest genocide could reduce tooth decay

Funny story: Republicans suggest genocide could reduce tooth decay

Washington DC. The Republican Party have announced their policies for the coming year, and most of them are the same as ever - cut taxes, cut spending, give money to the rich. However, one new policy has raised eyebrows. It is based on recent...

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Donald Trump Loses It at Stable Genius Award Ceremony

Funny story: Donald Trump Loses It at Stable Genius Award Ceremony

Palm Beach, FL--At his Mar-a-Lago Resort Donald Trump was awarded the Stable Genius Award, by its former recipient, Sarah Palin, at a ceremony attended by hundreds of Trump supporters who were there, purportedly, to Make America Smart Again. On re...

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Alabama Says It Will Secede from the Union Unless Roy Moore Is Seated in the Senate

Funny story: Alabama Says It Will Secede from the Union Unless Roy Moore Is Seated in the Senate

Montgomery, AL--Gov. Kay Ivey announced, after Judge Roy Moore's loss to Democrat Doug Jones, that unless Moore is seated in the Senate, despite his electoral loss to Jones, Alabama will secede from the Union, and expects other southern states to fol...

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Leaked transcript from secret meeting between Donald Trump & Roy Moore

Funny story: Leaked transcript from secret meeting between Donald Trump & Roy Moore

Donald Trump: "You're going to do amazing things for the great state of Alabama, Roy. Now get out there and grab em by the pussy!" Roy Moore: "Oh I get it now! You meant it as an expression! Like 'go get em' or 'break a leg.' This damn Fake News i...

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Republicans, Jubilant Over Tax Win, Draft New Bill Allowing Only Large Donors to Vote

Funny story: Republicans, Jubilant Over Tax Win, Draft New Bill Allowing Only Large Donors to Vote

Washington - Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, flush with success after the House narrowly approved the tax cut bill, a version of which also closely passed in the Senate last night, is said to be considering even more unpopular initiatives in an attem...

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Congress Considers a Ban on the Trophy Hunting of Sexual Predators

Funny story: Congress Considers a Ban on the Trophy Hunting of Sexual Predators

WASHINGTON, DC--Two representatives today co-sponsored a new Bill in Congress that would ban, in the United States, the trophy hunting of sexual predators. The bipartisan co-sponsors, Rep. John Conyers from Michigan and Rep. Blake Farenthold from Te...

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Alabamians Vote in Alleged Serial Killer Judge Roger Ray Morris as Their New Senator

Funny story: Alabamians Vote in Alleged Serial Killer Judge Roger Ray Morris as Their New Senator

AL--Alleged serial killer Judge Roger Ray Morris, who maintains the nine bodies buried in his basement were already there when he moved in, won an election on Tuesday against Democrat Doug Jones. Morris, who is out on bail pending an investigation...

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Roy Moore: An Entire Nation Bemoans Media Attack on Visionary, Insightful Leader

Funny story: Roy Moore: An Entire Nation Bemoans Media Attack on Visionary, Insightful Leader

Mobile, Alabama - Republican voters, politicians and commentators in Alabama and across the country are stunned and disappointed by the Washington Post story detailing possible sexual abuse by Senate candidate Roy Moore of a young teenager 40 years a...

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Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

Funny story: Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

A Florida man and his family are safe, thanks to his quick thinking, and gunning down intruders on his front stoop. "I heard a knock at the door," says Robert, a thirty six year old white male from Tampa. "I grabbed my AR33 assault rifle and went...

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Gun Nut Layme DeRierre Says the Real Victim in the Las Vegas Mass Shooting Was the Much-maligned AR-15 Assault Rifle

Fairfax, VA--Layme DeRierre, CEO and Executive Vice President of the Gun Nut's Lobby, today said that the true victim of the mass shooting in Las Vegas was the AR-15 assault rifle used to kill over fifty people, in what is now the largest mass shooti...

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"I Stand By My President"

Funny story: "I Stand By My President"

Hypothetical: President Trump calls for the processing and imprisoning of 3 million illegal immigrants in internment camps in the United States. How will his fellow Republicans respond? Paul Ryan: "I idea of imprisoning 3 million immigrants--le...

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The politics of survival in Ghost Town, N.J., is existential, brutal and sad!

Funny story: The politics of survival in Ghost Town, N.J., is existential, brutal and sad!

GHOST TOWN, N.J. - "Mayor, Fat Cat Fringo wants to know if you've had the city water crew run the city water lines to his underground casino on the north side yet." I walked into the mayor's office and he was finagling around with one of those Rub...

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Sinkhole Swallows the White House

Funny story: Sinkhole Swallows the White House

WASHINGTON, D.C.--Residents are being evacuated from the White House due to a massive sinkhole that's already swallowed much of the Trump Administration. CNN reports that a depression the size of the Trump estate at Mar-a-Lago formed at around 8:...

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After Extreme Makeovers, Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to Hold Press Briefings on Camera, with Sound

Funny story: After Extreme Makeovers, Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to Hold Press Briefings on Camera, with Sound

WASHINGTON, D. C.--President Donald Trump, who had formerly called his Press Secretary and Deputy Press Secretary "too fat and ugly" to appear on camera, has tweeted that both Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders will again, after the duo's extr...

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So Sad!

Funny story: So Sad!

For a couple of decades now, I've made a practice of celebrating the Fourth of July by reading the founding and historical documents that underlie the exercise in representative democracy that is the United States. This has given me a new appreciatio...

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Encomium by a Conflicted Republican

Funny story: Encomium by a Conflicted Republican

Friends, Republicans, deplorables, lend me your ears; I come to defend Donald Trump, and to praise him. The tweets that men post oft live after them; And good is oft interrèd with their boners. So let it be with Trump. Sarah Huckabee Hath told you Trump is a fighter. And so he is, however fatuous, And pettily hath Trump now proven it. Here under leave of Huckabee and the rest (For...

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Deep Esophagus Reveals the Source of the White House Leaks

Funny story: Deep Esophagus Reveals the Source of the White House Leaks

AT A PARKING GARAGE SOMEWHERE IN WASHINGTON--In a meeting between David Corn of Mother Jones and a shadowy figure who only identifies herself as "Deep Esophagus," the source of the many leaks that have plagued the Trump Administration are coming to l...

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HB3 to Make Public Bathrooms Unavailable to Straight Men Unless They Can Prove They Aren't Child Molesters

Funny story: HB3 to Make Public Bathrooms Unavailable to Straight Men Unless They Can Prove They Aren't Child Molesters

New York, NY--The New York state legislature is poised to pass House Bill 3, which would make public bathrooms unavailable to straight men unless they can prove that they are not child molesters. Said Representative Anthony Sawyer, one of the spon...

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Breaking news…

Trump Sorry For 'Horseface' Tweet

Trump apologizes to Stormy Daniels for calling her 'horseface' in a
tweet. Tweet was actually meant for Kelly Ann Conway.
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