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Funny satire stories about Jose Mourinho

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Jose loves Abramovich, but he does not love Jose!

Funny story: Jose loves Abramovich, but he does not love Jose!

One of the best running London soap operas has ended and a painful love affair brought to an abrupt end as the whole world wakes up to the divorce of the season; Abramovich has booted Jose! Twitter, Facebook, etc, have all gone ballistic after th...

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The Special One is a victim of tabloid scumbags!

Funny story: The Special One is a victim of tabloid scumbags!

A once very "Special One" loved by Chelsea Dandy's, Fairies and other Mad Hatters, has become yet another bloody victim of British tabloids a most desirable pack of blood-thirsty bloodhounds, unique in the world and second to none! The Daily S++r,...

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Chelsea Players Asked Not To Dive During Man City Match

Funny story: Chelsea Players Asked Not To Dive During Man City Match

Chelsea players have been implored not to dive during their head to head with Manchester City, due to a lack of medical staff on their bench. After Jose Mourinho's bizarre sending off of his medical team, it has left the London side facing a diffi...

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Arsenal Win But Real Madrid Have Ten Eropean Cups

Funny story: Arsenal Win But Real Madrid Have Ten Eropean Cups

A weird event happened in the world of football this weekend: Arsenal won away at one of the best teams in the country. After (if you read the football papers) a hundred and seventy five years and nearly a million games Arsenal finally managed to scr...

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Jose Mourinho decides new tactics

Jose Mourinho has started using a new tactic of open players' pants if they lose a game. "It will be a fun way to decide who is going home with his virginity intact."says Jose Mourinho after the team drew 1-1 with Manchester City in the premiere l...

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Angry Liverpool Management Complains to DVLA As Mourinho Parks Two Buses

Funny story: Angry Liverpool Management Complains to DVLA As Mourinho Parks Two Buses

Jose Mourinho was unapologetic following his team's victory at Liverpool after which he admitted to parking two buses in front of the Chelsea goal. However Liverpool's management was apoplectic at the unorthodox tactics used by Mourinho claiming tha...

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Mourinho Blames Toilet For Missing The Target

Funny story: Mourinho Blames Toilet For Missing The Target

After getting drunk to forget the devastating loss to Sunderland, Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho blamed his toilet for not being in the right place as a lot of his excrement missed the target. Behind closed doors, Jose has been cleaning up his mess be...

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Didier Drogba Reveals Sensational Secret He Learned at Galatasaray

Funny story: Didier Drogba Reveals Sensational Secret He Learned at Galatasaray

Didier Drogba has tonight revealed a sensational secret that could explain his recent success at Galatasaray. He said that he has learned that success on the football pitch is not about training, and it is not about teamwork, it is, apparently, all...

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Jose Mourinho considers quitting Chelsea to sit in stand and watch Chelsea

Funny story: Jose Mourinho considers quitting Chelsea to sit in stand and watch Chelsea

Jose Mourinho is seriously considering jacking in the job as Chelsea boss to sit in the stands permanently and watch the team. Mourinho was 'sent to the stands' for arguing with the referee over the away teams time-wasting during Saturdays 4-1 win...

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Man United v Chelsea: Rooney swaps teams at half-time

Funny story: Man United v Chelsea: Rooney swaps teams at half-time

Dwayne Rodney finally got his wish of a transfer away from the Manc'ester devils last night - although he didn't move far - only to the away team dressing room as Marmitechester United hosted Chelsea in the first Monday night 'classico' of the season...

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Jose Mourinho updates his status once more

Funny story: Jose Mourinho updates his status once more

Jose Mourinho has rebranded himself again, following his return to Chelsea and Stamford Bridge for the first time since his acrimonious sacking by Roman Abramovitch in 2007. During his first spell, he told journalists he was the 'special one'. At...

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Contestants line up for New season of reality show 'Dicing With Russians'

Funny story: Contestants line up for New season of reality show 'Dicing With Russians'

Channel Dive press team officially announced the launch of the tenth season of 'Dicing With Russians' direct from Stamford Bridge but refused to confirm the contestants until the end of the week. Rafa Benitez is the defending champion, having seen...

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Chelsea to appoint New Interim Manager

Funny story: Chelsea to appoint New Interim Manager

After three games and only one goal Rafael Benítez has been sacked by Chelsea FC. This after a humiliating 3=1 loss to cross town rivals West Ham United. Already there are rumors as to who will take Benítez' place with several names doing the roun...

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Football Gossip & comments 13th July 2012

Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 13th July 2012

Porto striker Hulk has denied he is close to signing a deal to join Chelsea. The 25-year-old, who is part of the Brazil squad for this summer's Olympics, is happy to remain in Portugal. He's waiting for Chelsea to play in a green kit before he signs an incredible deal. David Beckham will not stay in London for the whole Olympics after he was left out of the Team GB squad. He will instead retu...

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Roman Abramovitch to quit Chelsea after eight years

Funny story: Roman Abramovitch to quit Chelsea after eight years

After last months nail-biting European Champions League Final where his Chelsea side beat Bayern Munich on penalties, Chelsea star owner Roman Abramovitch has confirmed he is leaving the club. After pumping around £500m into the club since the sum...

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"The Special One" pokes Pep Guardiola in the eye!

Funny story: "The Special One" pokes Pep Guardiola in the eye!

After putting up with the spectacular "falls", "dives" and "Hollywood play-acting" of a certain Chelsea pensioner, Barcelona trainer, Pep Guardiola, has now been poked firmly in the eye by his main rival, "The Special One"! Last night's El Clasico...

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Roman Abramovich decides on new Chelsea manager

Funny story: Roman Abramovich decides on new Chelsea manager

Roman Abramovich shocked the world of football today by announcing that he would do the job of Chelsea manager himself. After sacking young pup Andre Villas-Boas on sunday after a 1-0 defeat at West Bromwich Albion, the media immediately threw the...

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Transfer Window: Mourinho to return to Premier League at end of season - but with who?

Funny story: Transfer Window: Mourinho to return to Premier League at end of season - but with who?

Premier League chairman were measuring their linen baskets and coaches looking over their shoulders last night upon the news that 'special one' Jose Mourinho wants to leave Real Madrid and return to the Premier League at the end of the season - but t...

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The Queen Takes A Knee

The Queen of England takes a knee in front of Trump during the playing of the Stars Spangle Banner, joining the protest.
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