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Funny story: I don't want to swim with dolphins

I don't want to swim with dolphins

I like dolphins and I like swimming but I just don't want to put the two together. Intellectually, I have an inferiority complex when it comes to these sea mammals. Just give me something more stupid, like a sheep or a chicken and I'll swim with it. Or maybe goldfish. The American Navy used them to seek out sea mines so I suppose they were the first suicide bombers in a way. this is essentially a...
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Funny story: David Attenborough receives ASBO from dolphins

David Attenborough receives ASBO from dolphins

Sir David Attenborough, the face and voice of British natural history programmes, was left bewildered yesterday at having received an ASBO following filming of his new series "The lives of dolphins." As a result of an order he is banned from approach...
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Funny story: Giant Floating Turds to Blame for Beached Dolphins

Giant Floating Turds to Blame for Beached Dolphins

Marine biologists at Exeter University are developing a new theory for the mass beaching and subsequent deaths of Dolphins off the coast of Falmouth earlier this week. Scientists now suspect a flotilla of faeces discharged from a facility in Southam...
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Funny story: Dolphins Arrested After Lounging About On Beach

Dolphins Arrested After Lounging About On Beach

A school of dolphins found lounging about on a picturesque beach in Cornwall have been arrested by police and charged with being environmentally unfriendly. If convicted, the maximum sentence is death
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Funny story: Terrorist Dolphins Thwarted

Terrorist Dolphins Thwarted

A pod of dolphins specially trained by Al-Queda to swim up the river Thames failed in their attempts to explode outside the houses of parliament thanks to covert operations by MI6.
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Funny story: Hayden Panettiere Fails To Rescue Tiny Baby Dolphin From Japanese Whalers

Hayden Panettiere Fails To Rescue Tiny Baby Dolphin From Japanese Whalers

Heroes starlet Hayden Panettiere has been involved in a violent confrontation with adult dolphins as she struggled to save a baby dolphin, also known as a "sprat" or "roe", from Japanese fishermen.
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Funny story: Space Shuttle Discovery launches safely

Space Shuttle Discovery launches safely

STS-007 the space shuttle Discovery launched safely due to freak weather conditions which meant that nothing went wrong.
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Funny story: Dolphin Alleges Racist Comments - Two Men Arrested

Dolphin Alleges Racist Comments - Two Men Arrested

Two men were being questioned last night after police received reports of racial harassment against a dolphin which has become a local tourist attraction off the coast of Kent.
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Funny story: Tinned fish giants produces Tuna-friendly dolphin

Tinned fish giants produces Tuna-friendly dolphin

Tinned fish giants have today announced their intention to start producing a range of tinned dolphin products which will all carry the label 'tuna friendly'.
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Funny story: Whales Attacked Over Japanese Hunt

Whales Attacked Over Japanese Hunt

Whales have been severely criticised over their request to the International Hunting Commission, to lift the moratorium on the commercial hunting of the Japanese.
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Funny story: Dolphins Warn of Impending Doom

Dolphins Warn of Impending Doom

It sounds like something from a science fiction movie. Specifically it sounds like something from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, but this time it is true and fact really is a heck of a lot stranger than fiction. Dolphins are currently wa...
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Funny story: Flipper Captures Bin Laden!

Flipper Captures Bin Laden!

At Naval base Point Loma in San Diego Harbor, dolphins and sea lions have been trained since the days of the Cold War to spot and captures enemy underwater invaders. Despite the high confidence in this submariner mammalian program, all involved were...
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Funny story: Shameful Shocker: Identity of Dolphin Diner Disclosed - World's Tallest Man Fin Fiend!

Shameful Shocker: Identity of Dolphin Diner Disclosed - World's Tallest Man Fin Fiend!

Beijing - Contrary to earlier reports, the diner who ate the last remaining Chinese white dolphin - or bajji - was not a westerner but was, in fact, Bao Xishun, the 7 foot nine inch herder from Inner Mongolia. Bao, the world's tallest man, attem...
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Funny story: China's white dolphin: tasted great, now extinct

China's white dolphin: tasted great, now extinct

BEIJING, China - One lucky diner enjoyed a special treat yesterday when he ate what scientists confirm was the last of China's rare white dolphin. In an effort to promote tourism and China's unique cuisine, officials raffled off the opportun...
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Alabama's New State Motto

After Tuesday Alabama's state motto, Audemus jura nostra defendere ("We dare defend our rights"), will most likely be changed to Audemus pedophilium nostra defendere ("We dare defend our pedophiles").
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