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Funny satire stories about Dentists

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Dentists want a reduction from 5-a-day

Funny story: Dentists want a reduction from 5-a-day

Dentists across the UK are opposed to government measures to increase the so-called 5-a-day, and want the opposite. "We need Britons to reduce to three a day, or even two a day," said Denby Twist of the Dorking Dentistry School. "The last thing we...

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Kate's stunning teeth 'kept in a glass of water at night time'

Funny story: Kate's stunning teeth 'kept in a glass of water at night time'

London - The cosmetic secrets of Kate Middleton's pearly gnashers were revealed at a press conference at lunchtime today. A perfect alignment of all 32 teeth is mostly due to their part-time role that regularly ends at bedtime, orthodontic sources...

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Neil Warnock's teeth

Funny story: Neil Warnock's teeth

QPR fans are chewing over the formation of their manager's new teeth. "Sir Neil's Hampsteads don't seem to fit, he looks like Dick Emery's vicar" proclaimed lifelong QPR fan Ginger Vitis, a dental hygienist from East Acton. Warnock guided his...

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Three or four things your dentist won't tell you

Funny story: Three or four things your dentist won't tell you

When we go in for a check-up, we want to know what we can do to prevent high dental costs. Sure, we always hate to hear that we should floss more, but we want total honesty from our dentist. Or do we? Frankly, there are things that your dentist wants to keep to himself. Here's a list of the top three: 1) He's a boob man. He likes big boobs, small boobs, and medium ones, too. 2) He's a...

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Higher Education Stymied. Police Shut Down Meth Lab at Votech School!

Funny story: Higher Education Stymied. Police Shut Down Meth Lab at Votech School!

Police and K-9 units shut down a Charleston, W. Va industrial arts school after discovering that students, teachers, and the head administrator were running a pharmaceutical lab producing high grade Methamphetamine, (Meth.) Attention was drawn to...

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Sarah Palin Seeks Charity to Pay for Kids' Braces

Funny story: Sarah Palin Seeks Charity to Pay for Kids' Braces

Sarah Palin recently went on Fox News and publicly admitted that she could use some help in paying for her kids' dental expenses. "Do you even know how much a set of braces costs these days?" asked Palin as she made her case for asking folks who...

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Farting Dentist Banned

Funny story: Farting Dentist Banned

Matthew Stilton, known as 'the farting dentist' because of his disturbing flatulence has been banned from his practice because of 'inappropriate behaviour'.. A colleague complained that he was giving patients 'the wrong sort of gas' and it made th...

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US House covets dental gold

Funny story: US House covets dental gold

Washington DC - A confidential source, code-named Praline, on a key committee of the US House has revealed that not only will Social Security be cut to the quick, but Baby Boomers will be targeted in a new way. As gold is expected to reach $2,000...

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Local Man Left Bloody & Beaten after Encounter with Dental Hygienist over Language Barrier!

Funny story: Local Man Left Bloody & Beaten after Encounter with Dental Hygienist over Language Barrier!

A Local Man, a semi articulate and part time satire writer, was left speechless after a mind numbing encounter with a dental hygienist today which left him bloody and wishing for a kidney stone attack instead. Melvin Wordsmithe, a mild mannered r...

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News Anchor hospitalised, Dental Patients left gagging as Natural Amalgam scandal unfolds

Funny story: News Anchor hospitalised, Dental Patients left gagging as Natural Amalgam scandal unfolds

Dr. Harry Monk, a dentist in Newcastle has become embroiled in a major NHS scandal. Monk's Dental practice website states: "Mercury fillings are unsightly, and there is anecdotal evidence mercury amalgam may be hazardous to health" "At Mon...

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Dentists Slam Ugly Betty's Braces

Funny story: Dentists Slam Ugly Betty's Braces

Orthodontists are sick to the back teeth of patients refusing to wear dental braces - all thanks to Ugly Betty! TV's eccentrically-clad magazine tyro Betty Suarez is famous for her lack of fashion sense, her hair - and, of course, her braces. B...

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Report from Taiwan dentists - chowing down on large burgers can damage your jaw

Funny story: Report from Taiwan dentists - chowing down on large burgers can damage your jaw

Taiwanese dentists have urged fast food chains to drop over-sized burgers from their menus following a growing number of jaw injury cases. Apparently the human jaw is only meant to handle objects up to one and a half inches thick. Personally,...

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Prisoner's £50,000 toothache causes Taxpayer £50,000 Headache

A notorious gangland killer has been awarded nearly £50,000 of taxpayers money following reports of inadequate dental care at a top security prison. Food Michael Steel, 82, speaking from his cell, defended the decision. "Look, I've waited 2 wee...

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Denists' Nightmare Jaimee Grubbs Faces SCRAM Judge.

Funny story: Denists' Nightmare Jaimee Grubbs Faces SCRAM Judge.

Jungle-fever-having celebrity cumdumpster Jaimee Grubbs was in a Beverly Hills Court this morning, facing charges of Felony F-cking of a Married Athlete, Driving with a Suspended License, and Becoming Famous Without a Full Set Of Teeth, also known as...

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U.S. set to prosecute candymaker

Funny story: U.S. set to prosecute candymaker

"Two hundred fifty-six billion cavities and counting", says the head of a Senate investigative committee on health and welfare, J.P. Piedmont Morgan, VI. "It's a dental disaster of the most decadent kind. We have indicted the candy industry for...

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Dry Cleaning Chemicals Make Great Mouthwash

Funny story: Dry Cleaning Chemicals Make Great Mouthwash

You don't take it straight but dry cleaning chemicals diluted with water and a little lemon juice cleanse the mouth like nothing else - including hydrogen peroxide. Raul and Claudio Jimenez learned the secret while visiting Guadalupe de la Mar...

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Biden leaves stimulus package at dentist's office

Vice President Joe Biden admitted yesterday that he left the economic stimulus package at his dentist's office when he went in for a routine cleaning. Biden said he was called into the exam room and even brought the package, which he had in a sho...

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New Fake Colgate Disaster As Man's Teeth Fall Out

Funny story: New Fake Colgate Disaster As Man's Teeth Fall Out

The fake Colgate toothpaste story took a new twist today, when the teeth of a man from Wimbledon who used Colgate to brush his teeth before bedtime last night, had to call an ambulance this morning when ALL OF HIS GNASHERS FELL OUT! Eric Dribble,...

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Breaking news…

Ex-CIA John Brennan Heads Up New Militant Group

Emulating his hero Robespierre, a pissed-off Brennan leads a new faction of Contra-Deplorables. The goal is to execute via guillotine at CIA HQ all those who disagree with him.
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