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Francis Bacon Sandwich self portrait fetches $50m at NYC auction

Funny story: Francis Bacon Sandwich self portrait fetches $50m at NYC auction

New York - The selfie is thought to have been inspired by the aritst's brief stay at an East Ham, London massage parlor where two voluptuous masseuses plied him with drink before getting out an old Polaroid. Tonight bidding for the 10" x 6" maste...

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NASA Puts "Yellow Ladder" Into Orbit

Funny story: NASA Puts "Yellow Ladder" Into Orbit

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - MoMA, the Museum of Modern Art in New York City, has confirmed that Petrov Daviditch's Post Modern Masterpiece, Yellow Ladder Floating in Deep Space, has been successfully put into orbit as the Milky Way Galaxy's first known art...

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2014 Burning Man Festival Relocates to Craters of the Moon

Funny story: 2014 Burning Man Festival Relocates to Craters of the Moon

ARCO, IDAHO - Burning Man Festival Organizers have announced the location for the 2014 event will not be Nevada's Black Rock Desert, as is usual. "Our Vibe is telling us that we need to acknowledge the Earth's pain," said spokesman Kish Hipscombe,...

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Is It A Zombie? or Practically Nude Man Sleepwalking in Snow!

Funny story: Is It A Zombie? or Practically Nude Man Sleepwalking in Snow!

What most people saw in the Massachusetts Wellesley College area was a practically naked man either sleepwalking or in a frozen Zombie-like Trance! Whatever it was, the Headmaster immediately called the campus police and the local sheriff, who m...

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Francis Bacon portrait of his cat 'Rasher' set to sell for a hundred million bucks

Funny story: Francis Bacon portrait of his cat 'Rasher' set to sell for a hundred million bucks

New York - A Manhattan auction house estimates Bacon's classic 1969 oil on canvas portrait of his pussycat Rasher will be a runaway hundred million dollar success at their forthcoming sale this week. NYC auctioneers Dribble & Gavel say they ha...

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Mystery of what Henry Moore "Jay Lo" sculptures are is solved by Optician

Funny story: Mystery of what Henry Moore "Jay Lo" sculptures are is solved by Optician

The huge sculptures in Leeds resembling pregnant nude women with enormous bottoms are the result of the notoriously incomprehensible sculptor not being fitted with the correct spectacles, a spokesperson for Specsavers claimed this morning. "...

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Australian Culture Gurus on fact finding tour of La Gambia

Funny story: Australian Culture Gurus on fact finding tour of La Gambia

Australia, keen to lose its Barbecue and Beers image has assembled a cultural fact finding team to "find out what this culture lark is". The team will visit selected countries with what it imagines to have a more impressive global Intellectual pr...

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Armed Police mistake colour chart for missing Damien Horst colour spot painting

Funny story: Armed Police mistake colour chart for missing Damien Horst colour spot painting

Armed art trained police swooped on a decorators van in Notting Hill this morning. Mr. C. Mycrack told our reporter, "I had this Crown Paints gloss colour chart in the back of my van, its just a kind of large sheet of coloured circles that my custome...

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Spanish Cathedral tops WTF list

Funny story: Spanish Cathedral tops WTF list

The hideous Antoni Gaudi unfinished Cathedral mess in Barcelona has topped the Mobile Device What The Fuck list 2013. The "Cathedral" which looks like someone has put a blowtorch to the Magic Kingdom Fairy Castle in EuroDisney is basically a surre...

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Chimp Wins Art Contest, Hires Lawyer

Funny story: Chimp Wins Art Contest, Hires Lawyer

No sooner was it announced that Brent, a 37-year-old Louisiana chimp, had won first prize in a chimpanzee art contest (read about it here on TheGuardian.com website) than the chimp called a lawyer to complain that the sanctuary where he lived would b...

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Identity of Da Vinci's Mona Lisa Confirmed As Roseanne, His Gymboree Teacher

Funny story: Identity of Da Vinci's Mona Lisa Confirmed As Roseanne, His Gymboree Teacher

Scientists in Florence, Italy, have confirmed the identity of Leonardo Da Vinci's model for his Mona Lisa painting, after centuries of speculation. Extensive DNA testing of an exhumed body, computer modeling, and meticulous employment records from...

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Erotic art

Erotic art is an excuse, in the form of sketches, paintings, sculptures, and other media, to show naked people, many of whom are depicted as engaging in "erotic" (a codeword for sexual) activities. Although some people try to distinguish between erotic art and pornography, no argument for such a distinction has ever been generally accepted, and most people agree that one person's erotic art is ano...

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Comic Books: Literacy for the Illiterate

A comic book is a magazine, rarely a book, printed on cheap newsprint or toilet tissue, which is rarely funny, or "comic," so it should be renamed, but those in the industry are lazy, preferring to draw poorly executed pictures that illustrate barely literate narratives (stories) in bold and fancy fonts. Due to the imbecilic level of their "reader's" intelligence and literacy, these magazines a...

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Giger gay bar to open in Castro District

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - At the invitation of former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, her "good friend," artist H. R. Giger has agreed to license his artwork for use in another of his series of so-called "Giger Gay Bars." If the bar does well, Pelosi...

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Bare-breasted portrait of Michelle Obama not "artsy fartsy"

MADRID, SPAIN - According to Jessica Wakeman, whoever the hell she is, a portrait of Michelle Obama topless is not art; in fact, it is not even "artsy fartsy." The portrait appeared on the cover of the Spanish magazine Clutch, which often shows fema...

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Banksy unveils art installation made of his own shit

Funny story: Banksy unveils art installation made of his own shit

Controversial street artist Banksy has unveiled an 8ft wall painting of a masturbating baby made entirely of his own shit. The piece entitled "Waaaaa Waaaaa Wanky" which is the first of seven excrement-based pieces Banksy intends to produce; will...

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FBI reckons art heist is more 'Ship of Fools' than Rembrandt's 'Storm on the Sea of Galilee'

Funny story: FBI reckons art heist is more 'Ship of Fools' than Rembrandt's 'Storm on the Sea of Galilee'

Boston - Federal agents investigating a $500 million international art heist from the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum are poised to bust a renegade ex-Mossad money laundering ring following a successful trip to Israel on the back of US Airforce One t...

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Banksy Art Removal Sparks Black Market For 'Wall Art'

Funny story: Banksy Art Removal Sparks Black Market For 'Wall Art'

Following the recent mysterious removal and attempted sale of Banksy's street art, a new black market has quickly emerged for the wall plaster behind other valuable artwork. Earlier this week, a London art gallery was broken into and the plaster b...

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Breaking news…

Putin Hacked The Emmys

NBC, ABC, and CBS all claim that Russian President Putin hacked the Emmy Award computers, to explain how unknown, barely-viewed shows on Netflix and HBO could win so many awards.
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