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Funny story: Genius Donald Trump to re-film the whole of Star Wars, and playing every role

Genius Donald Trump to re-film the whole of Star Wars, and playing every role

'If you strike me down, I will become more humble than you could ever imagine'. 'These aren't the presidential traits you are looking for' Donald Trump is to spend billions on re-filming all of the Star Wars Films, and playing all of the roles.
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Funny story: Horse denies that Donald Trump is a Stable Genius

Horse denies that Donald Trump is a Stable Genius

David Smith, a black horse with wonky teeth has denied that Donald Trump is a stable genius. Smith told us, 'Yes, the hay was all over the place, and because of his small hands, and bad back, Donald, or Donnie to his mates couldn't move it. He als...
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Funny story: Jeremy Hunt spends weekend waiting in a corridor

Jeremy Hunt spends weekend waiting in a corridor

Former Health, Education, Water-parks, Traffic Control and Stationary Secretary Jeremy Hunt has spent the weekend waiting in a corridor for news of his next appointment, Deputy Prime Minister and keeper of the Parliamentary pornography. Waiting fo...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Weighing up Pantomime offers

Donald Trump Weighing up Pantomime offers

Following the explosive publication of Fire and Fury, Donald Trump is now in talks to star in Pantomime in largely out of the way provincial theatres. Places such as Whitby, Rhyll, Brighton and Walsall are in talks for the bewigged, small handed P...
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Funny story: Charles Dance to read the audio book of Fire and Fury

Charles Dance to read the audio book of Fire and Fury

Charismatic British actor Charles Dance has signed a multi million pound contract to narrate the Donald Trump tell all Fire and Fury. The star of any film which requires a charming cad, a charming villian, a charming misunderstood loner, or a char...
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Funny story: Steve Bannon wins next series of The World's Biggest Loser

Steve Bannon wins next series of The World's Biggest Loser

Steve Bannon, Donald Trump's cackling Gollum figure is all set to win the next series of televisual entertainment smorgasbord 'The World's Biggest Loser'. The hirsute buffoon has been nominated by Donald 'Teflon' Trump, who's arms and tiny hands g...
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Funny story: Toddler decides that the behaviour of the President is completely selfish

Toddler decides that the behaviour of the President is completely selfish

Gary Watson, 3, has philosophised that the behaviour of Donald Trump really goes beyond the pail. Speaking to us, whilst throwing a tantrum on the floor of his local Tesco the erudite expert in human behaviour told us, 'A tantrum is fair enough in...
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Funny story: Donald Trump told to stop licking the Cactus

Donald Trump told to stop licking the Cactus

A White House aide has revealed that Donald Trump has to be repeatedly told to stop licking a Cactus in the White House. The Cactus, which is a large green one in the Oval Office, and was a gift from Barack Obama on his leaving Obama said 'Yes,...
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Funny story: Clematis Wilt Reunion

Clematis Wilt Reunion

The long forgotten prog rock orchestra Clematis Wilt have announced a massive world wide tour for 2018. Daniel Pretension, the band's drummer, and bassist Butch Arpeggio put the group together in 1973, following on the success of Mike Oldfield's T...
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Funny story: Vegetarian Cat Swears vengance on his owners

Vegetarian Cat Swears vengance on his owners

Vegetarian cat, Tiddles Smith, 3, from Chutney on the Fritz has declared vengance on his owners, Mr and Mrs Smith for feeding him a diet of meat for years. The angry moggy says 'All of those hints I have been dropping, such as eating grass, steali...
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Funny story: Depressed Mould Experiences Back-To-Work Blues

Depressed Mould Experiences Back-To-Work Blues

Gary Johnson, a blue and green mould has been depressed for a few days now, after being viciously washed off a mug. The germ form told us 'I had it on easy street, growing on a white mug, with plenty of sour milk in it, I was there for a couple of...
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Funny story: Donald Trump tweets, again

Donald Trump tweets, again

In American news, US President Donald Trump has replied to more than a million of his followers with the deeply cynical 'My Dad is bigger than your Dad' the favourite taunt of any scrawny seven year old in the playground. The thing is, Donald Trum...
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Funny story: Man breaks new year's resolution

Man breaks new year's resolution

Donald Smith of Basingstoke has broken his only new year's resolution in only one day. The Office worker claimed that he wanted to get fit, and joined a gym, paying more than £1,500 for the year's membership, but the chap told us that it is now 17...
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Funny story: Lempit Opik to give Donald Trump careers advice

Lempit Opik to give Donald Trump careers advice

Beanpole, former stand up comedian, harmonica and spoon player, politician and surprisingly popular with the ladies, Lempit Opik is to give Donald Trump careers advice. In January 2018, Donald Trump will be taking lessons in re-invention from Mado...
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Funny story: Massed Mumblings signify the beginning of 2018

Massed Mumblings signify the beginning of 2018

Around the country, families, friends and work colleagues are currently planning for the massed mumbling of Auld Lang Syne. The song, written by Scottish Poet Robert Burns is only really known for its first verse and chorus (much like the national a...
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Funny story: Nick Clegg says 'You'll address me as Sir, you little gob-shite'

Nick Clegg says 'You'll address me as Sir, you little gob-shite'

Newly Knighted, former deputy prime Minister Nick Clegg has told his former boss, David (Dave to my mates) Cameron, 'You'll address me as Sir, you little gob-shite'. The altercation took place in a part of London, where the former colleagues met,...
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Funny story: Donald Trump doesn't understand whole concept of Pantomime

Donald Trump doesn't understand whole concept of Pantomime

Donald Trump doesn't understand whole concept of Pantomime US President Donald Trump doesn't understand the whole concept of Pantomime, reveals former White House whipping boy Sean Spicer. Apparently, the practice of seeing former television st...
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Funny story: Proclaimers fan gives up after a mile

Proclaimers fan gives up after a mile

Wayne Hemmingway, (no, not that one) a life long fan of popular singing twins The Proclaimers has given up on his pledge to walk 500 miles for his ex-wife after only one mile, and two blisters that are absolute agony. The overweight love rat met h...
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Showing page 1 (of 24 pages)
Breaking News...

"Goop" Introduces Coal Egg

"Once you muster enough pelvic muscle strength to compress this baby into a diamond, you will have a beautiful gemstone to present to the man of your dreams," declared spokesmodel Gwyneth Paltrow.
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