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Funny satire stories about Russia

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The Secret England Footballer: World Cup Shambles, My Personal Roundup

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: World Cup Shambles, My Personal Roundup

By the time you read this, I'll be back in Blighty doing the biz with the owner's daughter again. Just what I need and so does she. We'll be off to Ibiza for some pre-season R&R shortly. Well, never let it be said that I didn't do my best for...

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Putin put out by trumpety Trump

Funny story: Putin put out by trumpety Trump

Vladimir Putin is said to be angry after Donald Trump revealed secret details about their meeting in Helsinki. The two world leaders met in a sauna near Malminkartanohiuppu Park, speaking through a Russian interpreter. Although no formal declarati...

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Strzok and democrats at congressional hearings see Russians here, there, and everywhere

Funny story: Strzok and democrats at congressional hearings see Russians here, there, and everywhere

Grilled by a Congressional Committee on possible bias toward President Trump, FBI agent Peter Strzok has suggested the Russians, again, are the benefactors. Various newscasters in the mainstream media, apart from FOX News, are ready to carry this...

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The Secret England Footballer: Croatia and Cretinous Decisions. I told you so.

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Croatia and Cretinous Decisions. I told you so.

You know I told you so. It's taken a day or two for me to get over my anger, but now I feel free to vent my spleen. Forget Gareth's M&S waistcoat, the penalty win over Columbia, slab head Maguire's goal, getting us to the semi-final and all th...

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Putin Claims No Russian Interference in Putin’s Election

Funny story: Putin Claims No Russian Interference in Putin’s Election

In a shocking break with all his intelligence agencies Russian President Vladimir Putin confirms that he believes Vladimir Putin’s claim that he did not interfere in Russia’s elections. “A slanderous claim," the leader said when asked about the a...

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The Secret England Footballer: The Swedes and Me Looking Like a Turnip

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: The Swedes and Me Looking Like a Turnip

"Lack of egos" in this England team is apparently what people are saying. "Esprit de corps" and lack of egos is exactly right and that's what's wrong with this team. Nobody has the balls to stand up to "Mr. Southgate" and tell him where he's going wr...

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Spoof Infiltrated by Russian Hackers?

Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller's investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election has uncovered evidence that another group of Russian hackers infiltrated the American section of The Spoof, the satire and fake news publica...

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The Secret England Footballer: Belgium Gone, Bring on Colombia

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Belgium Gone, Bring on Colombia

Well, I've been basking in the glorious defeat that was the Belgium match, just like the rest of the lads. One thing is spoiling it. No, that's not right...two things are spoiling it...no booze and no birds. I ask you. "Mr. Southgate" still wouldn't...

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The Secret England Footballer: Bloody Hell, Panama 6-1

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Bloody Hell, Panama 6-1

Bloody hell I say and I'll say it again BLOODY HELL. A goal fest and where was I? I'll bloody well tell you, I was warming the effin bench again. It's every player's dream to play in a World Cup and as you know Brazil 2014 was a washout for me aft...

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England V Panama

A dominant display from England saw them trounce a hapless Panamanian side 6-1. Goals from Stones (2) Kane (3) and Lingard ensured England wrapped up their biggest win at a World Cup without breaking a sweat. Of course after this superb England...

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The Secret England Footballer: First Round Tunisia Yessssssssss!

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: First Round Tunisia Yessssssssss!

Would you Adam and Eve it? We only bloody did it. We bloody won a match. Harry, you're not the wuss I've been saying you are (not to your face, obviously). Hats off to the Tottenham mumbler. I always knew you were class. There was one downer for m...

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The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Repino base

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Repino base

What a dump. I checked Tripadvisor before coming here and it's even worse then I thought. I'm in the middle of nowhere and there are less than 3,000 people here. Points of interest: Chapel of Saints Cosmas and Damian, you won't find me in there,...

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Men Died After Eating Cabbage

Funny story: Men Died After Eating Cabbage

In two separate incidents, thousands of miles apart, two men died in extraordinarily-similar circumstances yesterday - after consuming cabbage. The men - Thomas Jeffers, 45, of New Jersey, and Nickovitch Kuryakin, 48, from Nizhny Novgorod in Russia - were both healthy, middle-aged men, happily-married with two and seven children respectively, both worked for their respective governments, drank...

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Pensioner surfaces ‘alive and well’ after being brutally murdered

Residents of a sleepy Bognor street began last week mourning the violent death of a popular retired teacher. Bernard Stoat, 92, was discovered by his wife battered to death on their doorstep at 10.30 on Tuesday morning. The bloodstained weapon – a ha...

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The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

I know...I know what you’re thinking. How is it that after two years in the wilderness Gormless Gareth has seen the light and called me back into the squad? I’ll tell you how. Even GG knows class when he sees it and it’s when the going gets tough...

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Children's Storytime: Sergei And The Drone

Funny story: Children's Storytime: Sergei And The Drone

Hello, children! It's time for a story! Are you ready? If you are, let's start! Once upon a time, there was a man whose name was Sergei Skripal. He lived in a country far away, called Russia. He was a spy. Spies like to find out things. They like to find out about other people's secrets. They like to find out about secrets like what other people are doing, or what the other people are trying...

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Trump breaks free of his Russian programming. Issues brief statement.

The question of whether President Trump is some kind of Manchurian Candidate subject to Russian mind control has long been a subject of speculation among some Americans. Well Thursday night the whole country got their answer. Under hypnosis Preside...

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Editorial: May Attacks Syria

So after PM May decided “fuck it” and bombed the shit out of another country on tenuous evidence (where have we heard this before) she now fears a public backlash. The main shame is that she won’t be receiving said “back lashes” across her back with a glass encrusted whip. The carrion eyed cunt completely misjudged the public appetite for more wanton slaughter from above and now fear repercussi...

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Breaking news…

Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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