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Mourinho Spending Spree

Despite this season being a catastrophic failure of somewhat epic proportions Manchester United manager, Jose Maureen, will more than likely be handed even more money to throw at his failing team. The subsequent spending spree will more than like...

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St David's Day 'Davids' List Grows To 3

Funny story: St David's Day 'Davids' List Grows To 3

The BBC has reported that Manchester City's David Silva last night became only the third David to score on St. David's Day in the Premier League, when he netted during City's 3-0 hammering of Woolwich Arsenal at the Emirates Stadium. The two previ...

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Jose's Mindset

Who would have thought throwing £300million at a team would change them from a terrible one to a decent one? Well everyone except Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho who firmly believes the sun revolves around his giant ego. The only surprise now...

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The Problem With Pep

After even more holes were shot into St Pep's wings by the incomparable lad Jamie Vardy (who celebrated his hat trick with two kebabs and a packet of Marlborough) we caught up with the Manchester City Maestro to find out what was going wrong. When...

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Messi's Manchester Mess

Lionel Messi will escape any punishment for his childish outburst after his side were comprehensively beaten by Arab club Manchester City. The Argentinean whinger was visibly upset when the referee refused to award Barcelona a penalty or send a o...

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The Special One admits being special is not so special!

Funny story: The Special One admits being special is not so special!

The great Manchester derby ended with The Special One not being so special whilst providing their noisy neighbors with special gifts that only Fools and Horses would give away. However, in his defence, that resembled a Swiss Cheese factory, after...

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Peps Pep Talk

Revolutionary visionary football guru Pep Guardiola has already placed his delicate mark of excellence over the Premier League. He has told professional athletes that "pizza" is banned. We believe this is to stop Gael Clichy ordering Dominos while he...

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Manchester City pay man £50m a year to remove pizza from Joe Hart's diet

Pep has been in place for a few weeks now and City's head honcho has managed to work out exactly why the team under achieved last season. Pizza. Yes, you can assume that City will not be announcing Pizza Express as their official Pizza Partner...

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West Ham in Europe Sensation Predicted

Funny story: West Ham in Europe Sensation Predicted

The final matches of the season for the Premier League this weekend have been seen by several mystics and they have been contacting Spoof Football reporter John Westam. They forsee an astonishing end to the season with West Ham ending the season i...

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English clubs form their own Champions league competition!

Funny story: English clubs form their own Champions league competition!

After the dire performances of all English clubs in the European Champions League the FA (Football Association for our US friends) has decided to withdraw all English clubs because it is fed up having an embarrassing red nose every time it has to exp...

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Arsenal Win But Real Madrid Have Ten Eropean Cups

Funny story: Arsenal Win But Real Madrid Have Ten Eropean Cups

A weird event happened in the world of football this weekend: Arsenal won away at one of the best teams in the country. After (if you read the football papers) a hundred and seventy five years and nearly a million games Arsenal finally managed to scr...

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Liverpool Close to becoming Pain in the Ass

Funny story: Liverpool Close to becoming Pain in the Ass

Liverpool are close to being a pain in the ass again as their fans are on the brink of regaining their status as the most obnoxiously arrogant in England. Once the cocky, hubcap nicking Kings of the terraces, Liverpool have had their sense of smu...

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Man City Merry-Go-Round

New Manchester City coach Manuel Pellegrini used his first press conference to insist that he is here for the long term. "I intend to impose a certain playing style on City, through my methods and ideas we will-" Manuel was cut off as a burly a...

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Sir Alex Ferguson New Manchester City Manager

Funny story: Sir Alex Ferguson New Manchester City Manager

Sir Alex Ferguson, the outgoing manager of Premier League champions Manchester United, is to be unveiled later this week as the new manager of arch-rivals, and last year's champions, Manchester City. Sir Alex, 81, handed in his resignation letter...

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Man City fan snubs £62 Arsenal ticket to feed family for a week

Funny story: Man City fan snubs £62 Arsenal ticket to feed family for a week

A disgruntled Manchester City fan today proudly announced his family will 'eat like royalty for a week' after he decided not to pay the outrageous price of £62 to watch 90 minutes of football at the Emirates Stadium in 'that there London'. Manches...

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Balotelli booed, battered and Borussia-d off!

Funny story: Balotelli booed, battered and Borussia-d off!

After being involved in Man City's dreadful exhibition of anti-football played by a bunch of multi-millionaire cheats, Signor Balotelli, innocently, was booed off of the Dortmund pitch by 86000 laughing, happy Germans (unusual occurrence; apart from...

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Job cuts will see City lose top spot

Job losses at Manchester City FC will see Manchester lose its title as the world's biggest marketing centre, by the number of employees registered. City will lose its dominance because of a shift to the East Stand, combined with over-enthusiasm, e...

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Football Gossip & comments 10th September 2012

Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 10th September 2012

England and Manchester City midfielder James Milner, 26, says his Yorkshire grit fuels his determination to succeed. (Daily Mail) Yorkshire grit, tea-bags and yorkshire puddings. Ukraine coach Oleg Blokhin has banned his players from watching videos of World Cup qualifier opponents England's 5-0 win over Moldova - in case they are intimidated. (Daily Mirror) If they go on the pitch thinking...

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