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Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

Funny story: Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

New York City, NY - Local universities reported an uptick in popularity in Turf Management Studies, particularly for college applicants with Italian-American backgrounds. Students who major in turf management learn how to maintain the turf on sp...

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Don Blatter denies he's the Godfather

Swiss Authorities today announced a criminal investigation into corrupt actvities by Sepp Blatter (known variously as 'The Don', "'Sepp The Tongue'and 'Sepptic'",  the President of world soccer governing body FIFA. From his heavily fortified famil...

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The Dark Side of Premium Blenders

Funny story: The Dark Side of Premium Blenders

Washington DC: The FBI has stated that it will begin to track sales of all premium home blender purchases, but the public will not be inconvinced in any way. Special Agent Martin Hanes stated that, "We're openly letting the public know this for the p...

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New "Hire-A-Thug" Parking App is All The Rage!

Funny story: New "Hire-A-Thug" Parking App is All The Rage!

San Francisco, CA - Ivor Putinski loves his new home in America, and wanted nothing more than to use his various talents to help improve the lives of the people in his newly adopted country. This inspired Ivor to develop his new "Hire-A-Thug" iPhone...

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Pope Announces Sweeping Reforms

Funny story: Pope Announces Sweeping Reforms

The Vatican is introducing sweeping reforms to its liturgical practice. Mass, benediction and special services, from now on, will be all-ticket affairs. The "pensio" as the ticket is called can be bought online. Marketing director for the Vatican...

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FDA and EPA join forces to combat new death by aspartame study

Funny story: FDA and EPA join forces to combat new death by aspartame study

Washington D.C. - As the United States Federal government is about to run out of cash, our sources report that the FDA and the EPA are about to re-launch aspartame as a vitamin. In the light of a recent study showing that aspartame kills women (...

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Pope Francis not Frightened of Mafia "Cissy Boys"

Funny story: Pope Francis not Frightened of Mafia "Cissy Boys"

Pope Francis told shocked Mafia delegates at a meeting of Godfathers yesterday that their blood-stained money, blood-stained power and bllod stained handkerchiefs, can't now be taken with them into the next life when the new blood stain laundering me...

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Italy Outlaws The Use of The Word Mafia

Funny story: Italy Outlaws The Use of The Word Mafia

ROME - Pasquale Pettigolezzo, a reporter with The Daily Vino has just stated that Italy has passed a law that it says it should have passed years ago. Pettigolezzo said that the Italian Senate voted unanimously to ban the use of the word Mafia.

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Reporter gives left arm for story

CHICAGO, IL -- PBS TV reporter Miles O'Brien recently gave his left arm for a news story. Two weeks ago, he was filming an investigative report about authorities' suspicion that photographic equipment was being stolen by members of an Asian crime...

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Top Ten Mafia Secret terms To "Knock Him Off!"

Funny story: Top Ten Mafia Secret terms To "Knock Him Off!"

Here are the most overheard terms of late for knocking off someone according to over 10,000 FBI secret tapes, once they removed one that turned out to be a new flavor from Ben & Jerry's. 10. Changed His Name to Kennedy. 9. Won't be able to sign up for Obamacare. 8. Playing Harp with Lennon and Harrison. 7. Widow to save money on crematorium bill. 6. Will Vote democrat By Pro...

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Lady Gaga and the Camorra

Funny story: Lady Gaga and the Camorra

Through an internet news site, Lady Gaga sends a secret message to the Camorra crime family in Italy that she owes them $26 million dollars for performing concert's in Italy with their blessings. She assures the Camorra that she will pay them the mon...

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Crime Boss Salvatore Goombalini Explains Why He Bought Six Drones

Funny story: Crime Boss Salvatore Goombalini Explains Why He Bought Six Drones

NEW YORK CITY - The head of the Goombalini crime family Salvatore Goombalini appeared on an edition of Piers Morgan Tonight. The Brooklyn Mafioso recently told President Obama that if he gave him the word he would send a couple of his boys to Russ...

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Crime Boss Salvatore Goombalini Tells President Obama His Offer To Capture Edward Snowden Still Stands

Funny story: Crime Boss Salvatore Goombalini Tells President Obama His Offer To Capture Edward Snowden Still Stands

BROOKLYN - The notorious Mafioso Salvatore Goombalini, who heads one of New York City's biggest mob families, has informed President Obama that his offer of a week ago still stands. Goombalini, who is the eldest of 10 brothers, let the president k...

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Justin Bieber Receives A Message About His Spitting From Mafia Boss Salvatore Goombalini

Funny story: Justin Bieber Receives A Message About His Spitting From Mafia Boss Salvatore Goombalini

BROOKLYN - Salvatore Goombalini, head of one of New York's biggest crime family's, has heard about Justin Bieber's penchant for going around spitting on people. In the latest of half a dozen saliva incidents, Bieber stood on a hotel balcony and sp...

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Bookies Offer Odds on Pope and Berlusconi

Funny story: Bookies Offer Odds on Pope and Berlusconi

A leading bookkeeper has drawn up a book on the possibilities surrounding the disgraced Italian Prime Minister and Bunga Bunga media tycoon Silvio Berlusconi's jail sentence for corrupting minors. I spoke with CEO Jimmy Alyercash. He explained as follows: "1/3 is very good odds that Berlusconi will be acquitted on an appeal. The whole trial looks to us to have been a fix-up so that he would...

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New York Mob Boss Says He Can Take Care of Kim Jong Un

Funny story: New York Mob Boss Says He Can Take Care of Kim Jong Un

BROOKLYN - Salvatore Goombalini is the head of one of New York's most notorious crime families. The mob boss recently stated that he has had his fill of listening to the North Korean leader Kim Jong Un go on and on about how he is planning on atta...

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Papal and Cardinal Mafia - ]Hilltop Town, a Host to Popes for Centuries, Prepares for an Eminent Retiree

CASTEL GANDOLFO, Italy - This cramped hilltop town outside Rome is in its final preparations for the arrival on Thursday afternoon of an honored guest: Pope Benedict XVI, who will commence his new life as pope and chief molester emeritus. Italian...

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Russia has the largest money washing machine on the planet and it's not a German Miele!

Funny story: Russia has the largest money washing machine on the planet and it's not a German Miele!

Russia is losing billions of "dirty dollars" annually because they are being washed by a huge machine run by a bunch of criminal Scrubbers. Russian billionaires, the Russian Mafia and other criminal organisations are making sure that their hard-e...

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Fake Friend

Surprise, surprise! Apparently, Omarosa was Trump’s fake friend. This is definitely sad.
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