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Mary Magdalene Tell-all: "Jesus Was a Lousy Lay, But a Pretty Good Talker."

Funny story: Mary Magdalene Tell-all: "Jesus Was a Lousy Lay, But a Pretty Good Talker."

HEAVEN--Random Event Publishing, Inc., the main publishing house for Heaven, released last week, amid much controversy, the long-awaited tell-all by Jesus's follower and consort Mary Magdalene. In the tell-all Mary talks, to some extent, about her...

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Fact Checking Websites and Catholic Church to Shut Down in U.S.

Funny story: Fact Checking Websites and Catholic Church to Shut Down in U.S.

The Vatican - The spread of the "Alternative Factology" doctrine in the United States, United Kingdom, France, Australia and other heretofore "advanced" countries has forced fact checking websites like Snopes, Truth or Fiction and Politifact to close...

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Texas Legislature Orders Sperm Emissions to be Buried or Creamated

Funny story: Texas Legislature Orders Sperm Emissions to be Buried or Creamated

AUSTIN--Gov. Greg Abbott signed into law what the Texas legislature has deemed the "Save Our Sperm Law," which, Abbott said after signing the legislation, "will give voice to the unconcepted among us." The new law (in part an addition to Texas Adm...

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Nice painting "Looks Like Jesus"

Funny story: Nice painting "Looks Like Jesus"

"Well, I bought the painting a couple of weeks ago at a garage sale over on Glen drive" explained 56-year-old Martha Flanagan amidst the throng of neighbors and pilgrims in front of her home on Kenmore rd. "I thought it was a nice colorful painting...

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Jesus Tasered After Walking Into Church

33 year old two time zombie Jesus of Nazareth was tasered by an off duty policeman Sunday morning after he entered a Catholic church during mass. Witnesses from a home across the street from the church report seeing "some scroungy looking guy" ent...

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The Viral Broadcast That's Changing the World.

Funny story: The Viral Broadcast That's Changing the World.

Young Francis Muldoon was a strange little boy. He lived in a village in County Tipperary Ireland called Ballytohellnback. His father was a turnip farmer who also reared sheep and his mother worked as a maid at the local parish church of St. Patrick...

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Jesus Hangs Up His Crown of Thorns, Looks Forward To Retirement

Funny story: Jesus Hangs Up His Crown of Thorns, Looks Forward To Retirement

According a late-day press conference, God announced Jesus would no longer be in the family business and that the two had mutually agreed to part ways after over 2,000 years of working together. "It probably wasn't a good idea from the start," J...

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Remains of 74 Year Old Nun Found In Woods

Funny story: Remains of 74 Year Old Nun Found In Woods

The mysterious disappearance of Mother Helen Graham four years ago have been solved. She was last seen alive on a nature trail in the Angeles National Forest when she strolled away to look at a cactus flower. Her friend Sister Ellen Turner said, "she...

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Ohio school released controversial plan to expand student housing

With another academic year comes another addition to the University of Dayton student body. They University of Dayton is a small, Catholic college in Southwest Ohio. It is estimated that there are now over 8,300 full-time undergraduates enrolled, sig...

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Pope Presides Over Human Sacrifice

Funny story: Pope Presides Over Human Sacrifice

Pope Francis closed off his visit to Mexico with the ultimate nod of approval to the blending of Catholic teachings with indigenous Mexican spiritual traditions. Donning a Santa Muerta costume, he climbed to the top of a Mayan pyramid to preside...

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Pope: Ted Cruz Authorized To Perform Exorcisms

Funny story: Pope: Ted Cruz Authorized To Perform Exorcisms

Senator Ted Cruz has mockingly been called The Executor, The Inquisitor, as well as The Prosecutor, but Pope Francis revealed that one of Cruz's true titles may be Exorcist - or maybe The Exorcisor in keeping with the spirit of his past nicknames.

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Oklahoma Lawmakers Keep Exorcism Legal

Funny story: Oklahoma Lawmakers Keep Exorcism Legal

In a victory for religious libertarians, Oklahoma has passed the Family Religion And Re-Education Act, designed to keep exorcism, the casting out of demons, legal. Oklahoma State Rep. Sally Kern sponsored the legislation that protects family and...

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Trojan Condoms sponsors the Vatican

Trojan Condoms has announced a global marketing campaign to boost revenues. "The target market of 1.1 billion Catholics offers us our best growth opportunity" said Trojan spokesman Johnny Franger. Franger went on to explain the campaign. "We're s...

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'Is The Pope Catholic?' No, says Republican Congressman

Funny story: 'Is The Pope Catholic?' No, says Republican Congressman

Pope Francis, currently on tour,'isn't Catholic enough to be Pope', says Dennis Ladel a Republican congressman from central Arkansas. The freshman congressman objected to a number of positions the Pope took softening the Church opposition on gay ci...

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Nancy Pelosi Slams Barbaric Vatican Regime

It seems not everybody is charmed by Pope Francis. Indeed, one prominent US politician, Nancy Pelosi, is planning very stern measures to punish what she considers to be the right wing, unaccountable, and generally depraved policies and order of gover...

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Unprecedented Vatican Scandal: German Infidel Canonised

A scandalous leaked document from the Vatican highlights an utterly disgraceful and absolutely unbelievable lapse of judgment on the part of top Church authorities, which will almost certainly make the Church's reputation plummet to unprecedented dep...

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Pope Francis's Guide to Happiness

Funny story: Pope Francis's Guide to Happiness

1. "LIVE AND LET LIVE." "The Pope refers to not judging others and letting them continue with their lives in a way that best suits them." Really? Would the Church even exist if it had followed this? Remember the Crusades, the so-called Holy Wars, the pact with Hitler? The forcible conversion of natives? The indoctrination of the faithful through the Catholic school system? The exploit...

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Two Irish Kids Discuss Reincarnation

Funny story: Two Irish Kids Discuss Reincarnation

The following is based on an actual conversation between two 10 year-old Irish kids on the problems posed by the difficult theory of reincarnation. Charles' dad is into Buddhism, Phil's parents are Catholics. They both attend the same school....a Catholic school. Phil: Why do we have to die? Charles: So's we can come back. Phil: Back here? What for? Charles: So that we can become gooder...

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Breaking news…

New Bill Would Give Guns Citizenship

Sen. Ted Cruz (TX-R) introduced a bill {BLAKA} that would give guns US citizenship, along with the right to vote and own weapons. Asked about how they felt about this bill a gun said "bang bang click"
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