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Frozen black pudding saves lives! Vegans are horrified!

Funny story: Frozen black pudding saves lives! Vegans are horrified!

A UK butcher stuck in his freezer after a wicked draught blew through his shop and slammed the freezer door shut, used the only thing possible to save his life; frozen Black Pudding! Yes! Life-saving bloody black puddings are now being installed i...

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Five-legged lamb saved from butchers shop as it does a runner!

Funny story: Five-legged lamb saved from butchers shop as it does a runner!

A sheep farm near, York UK, has hit the headlines after a lamb born with five legs was heading for the butcher's bench, but instead it did a runner! The lamb was then caught by a passing vet who thought it was quite odd seeing a rather wobbly five...

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Robot Butchers wins pie making award

Funny story: Robot Butchers wins pie making award

Archibald Braithwait is a 3rd generation master butcher however he has been gazumped by his 5th generation robot butcher in this years annual pie making awards held in Edinburgh. Braithwait & Sons & Son introduced technology to their butc...

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Bull Elephant Stranded On Blackpool Beach

Funny story: Bull Elephant Stranded On Blackpool Beach

Holidaymakers - mainly women, who tend not to cope with such events very well - at Blackpool were left in a state of shock yesterday when an African bull elephant became stranded on the beach, having been washed up by the incoming tide. Most men p...

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Robert Pattinson And Kristen Stewart Disappear

Funny story: Robert Pattinson And Kristen Stewart Disappear

It has been exclusively revealed to us here at Tripe News International that Twilight toothsome twosome and bloodsucking bosom buddies and blood transfusing Transylvanian top totty superstars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have disappeared.

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Butcher sues sign writer

Funny story: Butcher sues sign writer

Arsene Cockbottom, master pork butcher of Scunthorpe has taken his sign writer, Justin Theole, to court, after receiving back his tariff of charges from the printers, claiming that it is nothing like what he asked for, and does not want to pay his bi...

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Eleven Year Old Butcher Slaughters Veal Cutlets for Mexican Gourmet Restaurantes

Funny story: Eleven Year Old Butcher Slaughters Veal Cutlets for Mexican Gourmet Restaurantes

Who doesn't love a thinly sliced veal cutlet? Mexican restaurant goers are no different and when you add the exotic curiosity of an eleven year old butcher slicing the fillets from live veals in a veal fighting ring, you know you have algo muy especi...

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New UK Knife Menace From Homicidal Butchers

Funny story: New UK Knife Menace From Homicidal Butchers

As the UK knife-crime epidemic spirals out of control on a hour-by-hour basis, it has been sensationally revealed that the UK faces a new menace in the growing knife culture.

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House of Tudor Butchery: The New Sweeney Todd!

Funny story: House of Tudor Butchery: The New Sweeney Todd!

Fleet Street ain't seen the like since its infamous Butcher Sweeney Todd provided the meats sweet and savory, for 'is landlady's cannibal pies. But now Mr William Tudor ov 'ouse a Tudor Butchery rivals the murderous butcher a Fleet St...

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Dreaming of Dean Martin

I don't normally talk about dreaming about men. Except he-men like Tony the butcher or Strangler Lewis. If I ever dream about them, I'll post it, then run, far away, hide, and look and see if anyone is calling me a fairy. And I know that most people don't like to hear about others dreams. They're too boring, and blah blah. But this one will excite you!...

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