Screen Name: John Redwood
John Redwood has published 4 items on The Spoof.
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Latest Spoof News Story: Tuesday 18th September 2007
Spoofing since: Monday 17th September 2007
Location: A few feet above THIS world
Profile: I see what you are up to but you wont catch me like this. Profile myself? I dont think so my friend, oh no not me. I'm cleverer than that. I'll let you know just what I want you to know and no more. But you can be sure that you will feel my presence everywhere. I'm lovely I am. No really, when you get to know me I'm really, really - lovely. Look into my eyes. You're drawn to me aren't you? They are mesmeric. I can see you, you know. I have the most interesting penis in the universe. It is the size of a new born kangaroo before it has crawled into it's mothers pouch, but it can expand to fit exactly any size of orifice into which it is inserted. I know what your smutty, juvenile mind is thinking - what about the Mersey Tunnel then? Mersey Tunnel? No problem. But stop the traffic first. I don't want to... hurt anyone!
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"Goop" Introduces Coal Egg"Once you muster enough pelvic muscle strength to compress this baby into a diamond, you will have a beautiful gemstone to present to the man of your dreams," declared spokesmodel Gwyneth Paltrow.
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