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10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3202431#1#270018

Fukushima Radiation To Hit The West Coast

City officials report that everyone's light bills could be reduced by as much as 85 percent.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3121991#2#912971

Massive Brawl Breaks Out At A Los Angeles Fitness Center

Police report that dumbbells were throwing around dumbbells.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3120255#3#179194

Pig Virus Cases Are On The Rise

Consumers are urged to chew their bacon at least 18 times.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3118634#4#46443

Russia Reinforces Military Presence In Crimea

President Putin has sent in a team of 24 Russian Olympic weightlifters.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3116782#5#385510

Global Debt Hits $100 Trillion

Carlos Slim, Bill Gates, and Warren Buffett offer to lend the world the entire amount.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.3114583#6#362552

Huckabee Warns of God's Fiery Judgement

Bill Maher says, "Hey Huck, stop worrying dude, there's no God."

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.2953125#7#21649

Jay Leno Says He's Entitled

Jay Leno stated that he has just received his very first unemployment check.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.2951736#8#269402

Good Thing It Ain't Like Mother, Like Daughter

Joan River's daughter Melissa has commented that sometimes her mother makes some of the stupidest, ignorant, most evil and demonic remarks she has ever heard.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.2949769#9#623838

Glenn "Teardrops" Beck Makes A Statement

Glenn Beck who is notorious for crying has stated that he has cut down on his weeping to just 4 times a day.

10#1516#Abel Rodriguez#41708.2948264#10#719514

Madonna - The Cottage Cheese Matron

Madonna admitted that she's got cellulite and she adds that it just goes to show that rich, talented, and extremely famous women can get that cottage cheese sh*t just like normal women do.

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