Written by jd Balderdash
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Tuesday, 27 December 2005

image for Judge orders Saddam Hussein's mouth Duck Taped Shut
"mmmmphhhhh!!"

Saddam Hussein had his LAST ranting raving lunatic courtroom outburst before the judge, fed up with Hussein's spoiled brat antics ordered Saddam's mouth securely wrapped and taped SHUT with high grade military Duck tape. Courtroom observers report Hussein's final words as , "I kill you ALL you LYING THIEVING MURDERING mmmmphhhhh!!"

Noted Duck tape expert, Bob Villa said that any folks who have actually had their mouths Duck taped shut do NOT for any reason attempt to remove the Duck tape which has been ducked to their mouths.

Duck tape says what it does, does what it says. Considered to be the world's most versatile, useful substance next to Velcro, Duck tape invented by Luigi and Mario "Duck" in 1831 was actually used on Apollo 13 by Tom Hanks to fashion a crude but effective Carbon Monoxide filter which saved the crew and made for quite an entertaining Blockbuster DVD rental.

Saddam Hussein, after the Duck taping sat quietly in his chair, speaking at first via grunts then moans then Mime then finally just giving the heck up and kind of just laying back watching the trial then stirring UP again looking at his watch as he had somewhere to go then .. looking forlorn and victimized for the media then ..

The Judge, still fed up to the brim and then some with Saddam Hussein told the former gasser of Kurds, the former mastermind of global nuclear Armageddon,

"If you DON'T settle down and SHUT the **** up we're putting a REAL SOCK in your REAL MOUTH too Hussein! THEN Duck taping it shut Hussein!!"

Hussein according to courtroom observers "settled down". Chilled even.

Attorney's for Hussein, perhaps humbled, shocked AND awed by the Duck taping raised no objections to the Judge's actions other than to say,

"Er .. judge? .. Is it ok for us to maybe object to your last action against our ... er .. never mind."

The "unnamed" Iraqi trial judge, still afraid to have his real name made public lest stray car bombs explode inappropriately says that he will consider un-duck taping Saddam Hussein's "trap" once Saddam Hussein learns how to SHUT "the living heck" UP."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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