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Friday, 25 February 2011

image for Colonel Gaddafi declares war on Dire Straits rock group
One of the Brothers arms

In an unexpected move by Colonel Gaddafi, his office today declared war on the popular, if slightly disbanded popular rock group Dire Straits.

Wearing a fetching tent and matching Gatling gun, the Colonel spent over an hour on the phone with the Foreign Office minister expressing his outrage, annoyance, sadness and downright lunacy with the pop group.

Speaking to Orla Guerin, well known for her attraction to lunatics in towels, Colonel Gaddafi was said to be extremely upset with the British Government, one of 278 governments he was said to be displeased with at the current time.

He said that the UK has no place to talk about alleged aeroplane bomb plots by old men with cancer, or policewomen being shot at form the Libyan Embassy in London when the UK harboured such criminals as Dire Straits who, he said, openly sold over 30 million copies of 'Brothers in Arms' without the government as much as blinking.

He went on to say that selling UK brothers in arms to all those millions must surely contravene the Geneva Convention on hostile-named CD's, and he demanded that Mark Knopfler, his brother and other members of the band should face an international tribunal to assess exactly the impact this warmongering piece of music has had on the world.

He said that while he agreed that Mark Knopfler's Newcastle accent was no longer a threat, he claimed Brothers in Arms was a war cry by the British to arm themselves and fight against the world.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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