Nora Williams, a plain speaking Yorkshire lass, claims that her newly fitted patio windows are haunted by the ghost of Lady Diana.
Late every night, a beautiful young lady appears outside my patio windows, accompanied by a foreign looking gent'.
Then they drift off inside a black limousine'.
Then there are terrifying screams and screeching tyres.'
And then the beautiful lady appears again, but this time she is trapped inside my double glazing.'
It really is quite odd', Nora added, and that Lady Diana should want to spend eternity trapped inside my patio windows'.
Nora strongly denied the possibility that the the ladies outside were selling their bodies to the gents who rolled up in black limousines.
'No, it's definitely the ghost of Lady Diana', she asserted.
'My beautiful Yorkshire rose'