Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: World Cup, burka

Monday, 26 April 2010

image for Extremist clerics forbid Kenyans not wearing Burka's to watch the World Cup!
Kenyan footy fans on the rampage without their burkas on,"fuck de extremists man, give us de footy!"

Extremist clerics in Northern-Kenya have warned all 'footy' fans, male or female, "if they don't wear Burka's whilst watching the World Cup, they will be banned."

This has caused an outrage in many parts of "footy nutty" Kenya especially amongst male 'footy' fans. Female fans in Kenyan strongholds are used to having to wear their headresses, but males?

Asked why this ban was to be put in place during the World Cup a local extremist cleric gave the following explanation:

"Allah told us that the showing of soccer in public places is like showing porno, men and women get excited, rub their bodies together and who knows what can happen, hence, all fans must wear Burka's just in case there is a mass orgy after the game and participating extremists could eventually be identified, this won't do!"

Local footy fan, non-extremist and village witch-doctor, Abudabijabi King-Congaballacks, also put his end in:

"Fuck de extremists man, i luv de footy and a bit of de pussy after de game man, if dey fink i wears a burka dey can suk my elephants dik!"

Local Witch-Doctors in extremist strongholds are hoping to put spells on the local crocodiles by sending them into the local mosques for some fresh pre-match Musli-McBurgers!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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