U.N. Sends Weapons Inspectors to U.S.

New York, NY- In a sweeping vote by the security council of the United Nations, a clear majority voted to send U.N. weapons inspectors to search the worlds largest democracy.

After a stunning four hour long presentation by the French Foreign Minister Michel Barnier which included satellite photos and documents accurately detailing America's nuclear weapons program. The United States decided not to use it's veto power as a State Department spokesman was quoted, "The United States no longer recognizes the United Nations and any resolutions it may pass."

The French who began their crusade to "disarm" President Bush last month are being hailled as victors by many anti-U.S. policy countries. Russia and Germany both sponsored the bill and have agreed to send in troops if the Americans do not willfully disarm. France has been massing troops in Quebec and even President Bush's recent trip to Canada was not able to ease tensions. French President Chirac stated, "We will not allow the Americans to intimidate the world any longer, if President Bush does not allow the U.N. to disarm him then France and its Coalition of the Kind-of-Brave will do it."

Sources in America say that the country is not ready to fight two wars at once and may be forced to pull out of Iraq to defend the homeland. Units the National Guard in states bordering Canada have been called up and are on the highest state of alert. In a hour-long televised address to the American people George W. Bush said that the U.S. would not allow any weapons inspectors and the first foreign troops to touch American soil would bring upon themselves a great firefight. "We will not be intimidated by the French, let them send their troops and with God on our side we will spill their blood on our fields!" It is still unclear whether the American people will fight bitterly against an invasion or lay down their arms and move in to the Rocky Mountains to wage guerrila warfare. One man in South Carolina said, "Any of those damn cheese-munchin' bastards come in to our country, I swear upon the gracious lord himself a whole world of s#$@ will be unleashed on them."

The United States has been given a 72-hour timezone in which to order it's military to stand down and prepare to allow weapons inspectors to enter the United States before the Coalition of the Kind-of-Brave have to take the weapons of the United States out themselves.