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Topics: Lesbian, fingers, Dutch

Tuesday, 9 February 2010

image for Young Dutch Boy Faces Charges For Putting Finger In Dike
I'd be careful where I put them from now on

A young Dutch boy who thought that he was saving his country by putting his finger in a dike has been charged with sexual assault and hate crimes against a homosexual.

Luther Grunden, who followed what he thought was his country's tradition, has been charged and faces twenty years in prison and as many years of counseling for his actions.

"Dah, Dah, she bitch slapped the shit out of me too," admitted the twelve year old. "I was just doing the same thing that the little boy did in the story that my teacher read to us, and now it seems my life is ruined."

Inga Johannson insists on pressing the charges both as simple sexual assault and as a hate crime. When asked if she would be doing the same if it was a little Dutch girl who had put her finger into her, she smiled and said "don't be silly. I love the little Dutch girls."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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