Written by Locket
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Tuesday, 22 September 2009

The new book by health guru Helen Strainhard is proving to be very popular with executives who simply are too busy to take exercise during the day. The book titled "Shitting is fitting" explains that using the toilet is often just a waste time. When we interviewed Helen she said "You know most people when taking a dump just sit there. Some people may have a cigarette or read the paper but why not use this valuable time to do a few exercises?"

In the book she explains in detail some of the exercises that are useful for both men and women and are very easy to do. She explained that different types of taking a dump need different exercise techniques. "If someone is having no problem in defecating and is just sitting there letting it happen then simply by keeping your heels on the ground and lifting the toes will work those important calf muscles. On the other hand when constipated you can work out those stomach muscles by straining twenty times every five seconds. If you need to nip one off then make sure you contract your chocolate starfish at least seven times which will help to keep good buttocks tone. When it comes to wipe and providing you do use loo paper then alternately use the left then right hands for six wipes with each. This not only exercises the arms and hands but the twisting motion can also relieve back pain."

There are many more exercises listed in her book complete with detailed photographs to follow. Helen Strainhard is also the author of two other best selling fitness books, 'Exercise while sleeping' and 'Getting fit during intercourse' both available in paperback.

If anyone has read the book and know of other quite good toilet exercises then Helen would be pleased to hear about it. Post your ideas to the forum at TheSpoof.com

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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