Written by Wire Piddle
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Topics: Michael Jackson

Wednesday, 8 July 2009

image for Michael Jackson Cologne - 'Perpetuity' To Hit Stores Soon
Perpetuity

Beverly Hills, CA - In an effort to cash in on the overwhelming popularity of the recently deceased Michael Jackson, 'The King Of Pop', marketers are preparing to release a new cologne. The cologne will be called Michael Jackson - 'Perpetuity'.

Said Newcastle University, UK chemist, Bramley Fieldstone, "It is intended to capture the essence of Michael Jackson as he begins his new journey into eternity. With subtle hints of hemlock and musk, its bold aroma comes from the ingredient boric acid, a particularly sweet smell that conjures up images of a newly opened, upmarket bed mattress. Over time, say within the latter hours the wearer is at a nightclub or bar, the sweetness degrades a bit and is replace by faint wisps of wet concrete."

"About the time the wearer is escorting his date home, the fragrance takes on a totally different character, devolving into a smell reminiscent of hot-buttered popcorn."

In test trials, surveys amongst participants have been generally good, with the exception of one participant who inadvertently singed the forelocks of his hair after misapplying the product.

There also is some concern that the product may promote sterility. Dr. Fieldstone allayed that fear by announcing that, as a side job, he and his colleagues were also involved in groundbreaking work of creating human sperm from embryonic stem cells.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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