Tehran, Iran - A judicial recount in Iran has had a very improbable outcome. Minnesota State Senate hopeful, Al Franken, has posted an overwhelming majority over incumbent President Mahmoody Ima Dinnerjacket.
Said Franken, "Oh my Allah! I didn't even know I was in the running." The Iranian election results have been plagued by protests, violence and murder. President Ima Dinnerjacket had thought the main contender for his job was Reformist candidate Mir-Hossein Mousavi. The final outcome, with Al Franken assuming the presidency, came as a bit of a shock.
Said Ima Dinnerjacket, "This comes as a bit of a shock. But as I've said all along, this is the work of the CIA. It couldn't be more obvious."
When asked about the results, CIA Director, Leon Panetta, bearing a striking resemblance to Peter Sellers in Dr. Strangelove, had only this rather perplexing assessment:
"It is better to kill two birds with one stone. Similarly a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. However, one must never count ones chickens before they hatch."
In the meantime, Al Franken was busy trying to find a flight to Tehran on priceline.com that didn't include seven hour layovers in Minneapolis and Atlanta.
Senator John McCain responded to the allegations of CIA interference by stating, "This result has nothing to do with the CIA and everything to do with a dysfunctional federal bureaucracy. How an American comedian contesting a Senate seat ends up President of Iran speaks volumes to the inefficiency of the Federal government. Perhaps it's time to burn all of out institutions down and start from scratch again. Call it 'shock and awe' or something."
McCain finished by saying, "Of course all this could have been avoided if the legislative branch had allowed us six months ago to nuke Iran."