Written by Bullshot
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Topics: Flying, Pig

Tuesday, 9 June 2009

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The International Air Transport Association, at a highly secret unpublicised public meeting in Upper Kalskag, Alaska, today announced a world-wide policy to protect the public from the dreaded SWINE FLU VIRUS.

Speaking at a press conference after the closed meeting IATA spokesperson Ms.I.M.Flitey said that the industry is aware of it's responsibility in this age of global travel. "Even though we will probably lose over $9 billion this year, we realise that we can't cut corners on this issue." she said.

Local reporter Tol Jusso, who attended the meeting disguised as a sled dog, says the airlines will be expecting passengers to pay 'a small surcharge" to help in the containment strategy. The new policy is as follows:

  • All passengers showing flu-like symptoms must be seated on the outside of the aircraft. This incurs a 10% surcharge.
  • all inside seating will carry a 15% surcharge.
  • Passengers who travel on any flight on which no pigs are present will pay a 40% surcharge.

All international carriers will introduce this regime from July 1st. 2009.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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