Written by Morag
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Topics: Newspaper

Sunday, 7 June 2009

image for Reporter Takes Newspaper To Industrial Tribunal

An investigative reporter claimed she was unfairly dismissed from her job for incompetence. Miss Lane told the Tribunal that she had held the position for several years and in all that time had never received any criticism of her work.

During this time she had worked undercover on many dangerous assignments without any complaint. She felt that the real reason for her dismissal was to make way for a younger colleague to step into her post.

Speaking in defence of Miss Lanes allegations, Perry White, editor-in-chief of the Daily Planet newspaper, admitted that the company had already replaced Miss Lane with a female reporter from WGBS-TV but stressed that the reason Miss Lane had been dismissed was for failing to fulfil the terms of her contract. Namely, to investigate and uncover the true identity of Superman, an assignment that she had failed to carry out even after fifty years.

Jimmy Olsen, a former Daily Planet photographer who had worked with Miss Lane on several assignments, said Miss Lane was as thick as two short planks and would only put out for Superman.

"I mean c'mon, what sort of a disguise is swapping your horn-rimmed glasses for a pair of red knickers? Everyone in Smallville knew it was Clark!"

Jimmy retired from The Daily Planet last year to concentrate on his thriving Superman costume hire business.

Chairman of the Tribunal, Mr Luther, found in favour of the Daily Planet but in summing up he said, " the employing of another female reporter could be seen as sexist, and broads hate that, in future the paper should be seen as more of an equal opportunities employer."

Leaving the Tribunal, Miss Lane said she was disappointed with the outcome especially that she was so close to finding out Supermans real identity.
"I practically spend every night with him." She said as she got into a taxi.

Mr. Olsen said, "See? As thick as two short planks. I can do you a good deal on a Superman costume if you're interested."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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