Written by matwil
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Friday, 27 March 2009

image for Brazilian president blames 'white basketball players with blue socks' for world's economic problems
de Silva's socks

Brazilian president Loopi Loco de Silva claimed that current world economic problems were not the result of international trading and deficit budgeting, but caused by 'white basketball players with blue socks'.

The surprise announcement was made at the Greedy20 summit in London, which opened today with an 8-course banquet, minstrels and a jousting tournament, and many eyebrows were lifted at Mr de Silva's comment, apart from Alastair Darling's, which are artificial ones.

'Let us be clear', the Brazilian leader stated, 'tall white men running up and down the play area then throwing the ball through a hoop have caused unimaginable damage to the developing world. They used to say white men can't jump, but it's this very jumping that has led to a worldwide recession, by great Carmen Miranda!'

And when questioned about the blue socks' angle, he added: 'Brown socks okay, red ones, green ones, no problemo. Even white socks can be fine, if kept under international scrutiny. But blue ones? No way, great Pele! Blue socks have just made the problems white basketball players have caused even worse, and this time it's no more mister chilli con carne and rice guy!'

This is not the first time Mr de Silva has made controversial statements, as in 1984 he said that the British miners' strike was started by Margaret Thatcher's piercing, staring eyes, and in 2008 he claimed that earthquakes were caused by hot air coming out of Sharon Stone's mouth.

But the Greedy20 summit will allow other world leaders to discuss the basketball players and socks' colours, and their relevance in modern global fiscal policy. 'Make no mistake', British Prime Minister Gordon 'Blue' Brown said, 'sockxist-lennonist strategies and basketballanomics will be on our agenda - along with a huge trough filled with caviar and a swimming pool full of champagne, to help the world's developing nations.'

In Harlem a few Globetrotters were silently agreeing with President de Silva's views.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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