(Zimbabwe News Bureau) The days of waiting is nearing to an end, as we approach the biggest day of Zimbabwe's National Election Day. Zimbabwean aren't the only people getting ready for the coming election, eagerly excited at the other end of the world are gamblers, who, a long time ago made their fortune in betting the Zimbabwe's National Election.
Mynard Zozol, a gambling addict who at one time went broke in Las Vegas and lost almost all of his fortune at playing "Paper, Rock, and Scissor." Hopeless, Zozol risked his last money in betting the Zimbabwe's National Election where at that time Robert Mugabe was one of the candidates running for the president. Zozol said, "I heard it first from my friends, at first I didn't believe them, I was reluctant to bet the election, later on I loaned my house and car after I have read the reputation of Robert Mugabe, he was just awesome at cheating, so I thought he would do it again at national level." Zozol got it right, one month after the election the result finally came in with Mugabe leading the lists with a huge gap of votes with that of his fellow candidates. Zozol got back all his lost fortune and came back to him five folds.
Today, any gamblers from anywhere he may be in the world could readily bet the election hassle free, with just a Paypal account and an internet connection, you are ready to go. M*gd*tc*m.com a discrete online site offers several schemes for betting, there's the "vote difference" betting and the "winner takes all" options. In "vote difference" betting the gambler wins the amount of money he bet multiplied by the difference of vote of the leading candidate. For example I bet $10 for Mugabe, and if he wins the election with a vote difference of 146,000 with that of Tschangirai, the calculation would be $10 X 146,000 = $1,460,000, damn that's a lot of money!
In the "winner takes all" scheme, two bettors of the same bet but of opposite contenders are matched, the one who win will collect the money of the other person. For example if I bet for Mugabe at $500, and if he eventually wins the election, therefore I am the winner and I will collect the $500 from the other person.
A reported rumor leaked around today that Mugabe might do it again.
Tuesday, 1 July 2008
posing for playboy...
Make alfred norton's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)
The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.
If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
RSS
Follow us on Twitter
More fake news stories
Scientists discover new species of fish
PAPUA, NEW GUINEA - Scientists know it as "pacu," but the natives of New Guinea refer to the same marine species as the "fellatio fish." "It's a real ball-sucker," Jimmy Wade told this reporter. "Sometimes, the fish goes even further, becoming a real...
Last Frites for Ratzinger ahead of Friday's Summer Solstice
Rome - A giant family sized fun-bucket of speciality Italian Fiefdom Fries has been delivered to the retired Pope's private quarters in Rome amid Vatican fears His Holiness might not make it past this Friday.
Treatment for blocked arteries has see...
GG Surprise for Hapless Punters
The GG races at Royle Ashcart have surprised punters who expected exciting races.
Unfortunately GG8 proved disappointing with Dick Branson on Virgin Ridiculous winning by a short head. Bermuda Shorts was left far behind and the favourites Jersey B...
Renaming of Heathrow Airport's Terminal 2 a spooky omen
London - "Does it mean she'll kick the bucket tomorrow?" an air traffic controlled chuckled at today's announcement that a revamped Heathrow Airport building has just been named Terminal 2: The Queen's Terminal.
"Everyone knows HM 'is terminal', h...
Gamekeepers get tigrish
London, United Kingdom. In news rapidly evolving over eons, the gamekeepers of Her Majesty's parks and reserves have voted to go on strike for 48 hours effective midnight Thursday to agitate for a 2% increase in pay which would bring them in line wit...
Knock-and-run incident is suspected 'terror attack'
Reports are coming in of a suspected terror attack on the streets of London this afternoon. An unidentified teenager apparently knocked on the red door of a local resident and was filmed afterwards using religious language.
Witnesses say that the...
Divorced Vlad The Impaler Putin 'has a rhythmic gymnast gentleman friend'
Bloodyvostock - "Think the Incredible Hulk in Alina Kabaeva's body," is how one Kremlin insider put it this morning, "a male rhythmic gymnast so supple and contortable it's a wonder all that spangly lycra never bursts during, er, workouts."
The an...
Homeless to accept chip and pin
Soon the old excuse "I've only got my card" will no longer be useful as a way to avoid persistent beggars after your cash - as homeless people throughout Britain are to begin rolling out support for the chip and pin card payment scheme.
Homeless p...