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Thursday, 29 May 2008

image for Fritzl cops discover 200km tunnel to Grail cult's Czech Republic sex slave camp
Grail Movement cultists believe the Messiah will regenerate from droplets of blood left on the Turin Shroud

Brno, Czech Republic - (Hideous Mess): Police investigating Austrian incest nutter Joseph Fritzl have found a 200km tunnel leading across the border to an apocalyptic sex cult's slave camp in the Czech Republic.

The Brno-based Grail Movement's hideout was found after probes of Amstetten's notorious former Nazi concentration camps revealed a hidden subterranean passage bearing due north-east via the Austrian town of Horn.

At the end of the tunnel they discovered five elderly female slaves working as bricklayers for the cult's prophet Jiri Adam, 74.

"They were erecting a Grail Movement temple to the Lord of Doom," one local resident said today.

The Czech town of Brno famously housed the Turin Shroud for many years and spawned hundreds of Armageddonesque sects based on wacky prophecy and polygamous enslavement of nubile females.

"Jiri Adam's cult believes in salvation on the Day of Judgement for those whose Earthly sanctuary in an astrologically aligned holy sepulchre, built according to sacred geometry principles," Brno's head of Serious & Disorganised Crime told reporters.

Adam's females slaves had been imprisoned by the sect prophet for over 20 years in an eerie parallel to Austria's notorious incest fiend Joseph Fritzl.

After making lengthy statements to Czech police about their decade-long ordeals the freed women were taken to a refuge center and told of Adam's arrest.

Meanwhile geologists brought in to probe the tunnel link have claimed a secret branch line from Amstetten connects directly with Rome's Catacombs under the Vatican.

A secondary branch line from under the Vatican leads north-west to the French Pyrennean town of Rennes Le Chateau, where the cult of Mary Magdalene has its holiest shrine.

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