Written by Wildjesusfishkid
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Monday, 16 April 2007

image for William and Middleton Split Over Gingham Dress
The Prince in his Weekend Attire

Speculation continues into why Prince William and Kate Middleton have ended their Four year relationship. Sources close to the Palace have hinted that it may have been Prince William's insistence that he wears a gingham pinafore dress and sings a selection of songs from "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers" and "Calamity Jane" in private.

They told us that it was a similar contributing factor that instigated the breakdown of his parents' marriage: Prince Charles always made a point of wearing a twin set and pearls when the Queen visited.

Tony Blair has urged the public to respect the couple by not speculating on the reasons why. Gordon Brown said that Tony would say that as now they have finished, he might have a chance of boning Kate himself now that William is out of the picture. Cherie will never know if the cabinet keep their gobs shut.

The Queen is reported to have told William not to rush into things and to take his time. Most women achieve orgasm after about fifteen minutes so it's no good going at it like a bull at a gate.

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