Written by Jalapenoman
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Topics: Saddam Hussein

Sunday, 31 December 2006

image for Saddam's Noose for Sale on E-Bay
The rope that Saddam was at the end of is to be cut up and sold on E-bay.

In an attempt to raise money and show independence from Coalition moneys, the new Iraqi government has put Saddam Hussein's hangman's noose up for sale on E-bay.

The twenty five foot rope has been cut into one inch sections. These were mounted on small plaques with small certificates of authenticity. The three hundred plaques are expected to sell for $2000 each (plus $29.95 shipping and handling), earning the government, after costs, about half a million dollars.

If the rope does not sell within 30 days, Ronco has agreed to make and market the plaques on an infomercial scheduled to star Cher.

When asked if this was not a strange and disgusting act, Iraqi spokesman Abdullah Mohammed Ben-Ayatollah said that "Oh no, we do not think so. This is a very, very nice way to commemorate the death of Saddam. We are even taking little drops of his blood removed during the embalming process and will be selling those beginning next month. Official locks of Saddam hair will go on sale probably in the spring, after we have liquidated the supply of blood drops and rope pieces. We then plan to cut up his sheets from prison and sell pieces of those; this worked for the Beatles and should work for us too. Saddam cost this country many lives, but we hope to make millions off the sale of this memorabilia."

"All items that we sell will come with certificates of authenticity from the new governement of Iraq, if we can get the Americans to let us use their xerox copier again and can kick in a couple of packs of paper."

Interested parties can search E-bay for the merchandise or watch late night infomercials or the Home Shopping Network for more information.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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