Written by Mark Lowton
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Monday, 6 November 2006

image for Hussein to Suffer Fate Worse than Death
You want fries with that?

In a change to the original decision made at the trial into his atrocities and war-crimes, the former Iraqi dictator, Saddam Hussein, may now be made to face a fate worse than death.

The Judge's original decision that Hussein should face death by hanging has been altered following worldwide criticism that this may give him a status of martyrdom.

Working in conjunction with McDonalds, the Iraq government will be opening the first McDonalds outlet chain in Baghdad since Hussein's arrest. As his new sentence, Hussein shall be made to live out his life, working 12 hour shifts in the store, building Big Macs, frying fries, and making milkshakes.

The outlet will be the most secure McDonalds in existence and is to be fitted with bullet proof sneeze-guards and armed guards on the drive-thru windows.

Hussein will be joined by other hardened criminals from Baghdad's overcrowded prisons as an alternative to solitary confinement. It is reported that following this news, trouble in Baghdad's prison is down by over 50%.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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