Written by queen mudder
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Monday, 11 February 2013

image for The Queen is next say Vatican psychics
It's on the cards, Ma'am

Rome - The Pope's shock resignation 'is just a warm-up act' according to Vatican seers who predict Joseph Ratzinger's lawfully wedded spouse Queen Elizabeth is next.

"It could happen any time this week," an Opus Dei tarot reader commented, "maybe on Ash Wednesday or St Valentine's Day if current supernatural conditions prevail."

The couple's secret 60-year marriage produced a son who has acted as Pope Benedict's Prefect of the Paypal Household and Pontifical Private Secretary since 2005.

Monsignor Georg Gangswine was then elevated by his father to the Archbishoprick [sic] of Baden-Baden following a stint running the Congregation for the Doctoring of the Faith - as the Spanish Inquisition is known these days.

According to Swiss Guard sources 'Gorgeous' Georg has inherited both his birth parents' love of theatrical attire and over-the-top bling.

He's likely to inherit all his mother's pantomime vestments and his father's 600 pairs of Gucci loafers.

Bookies make him 5/2FAV to lift the pontifical crown by April Fools Day.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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