Written by Jaggedone
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Wednesday, 2 November 2011

image for Monkeys working in Japanese restaurant are no "chimps"!
After the Japanese example Jamie and F-ing Gordon Ramsay are going to employ him!

Two monkeys working in a Japanese restaurant have proved they are neither "chumps" nor "chimps" in fact they are macaque monkeys and highly intelligent.

The owner of the restaurant employs them because they are cheap and only receive "monkey nuts" as wages. Human waiters and waitresses are much more expensive, always off sick, never on time, lazy and are always poking their hands out for tips.

The macaque monkeys serve their satisfied customers with bottles of booze and other things which they can't spill. They are not quite up to serving plates of boiling hot soup or meals yet, but they certainly do a grand job serving bottles, towels, cutlery, etc.

The customers of the restaurant love the monkeys and even invite them to share a meal, but the owner refuses to let them sit at the tables with the guests because monkeys can't handle the sake and a drunken macaque monkey could turn the whole affair into some pretty entertaining "monkey business".

Jamie Oliver and "F-ing" Gordon Ramsay are contemplating employing monkeys too based upon the philosophy of: "If you pay peanuts you get monkeys," literally. In fact Gordon's visage looks like the rear end of a baboon anyway!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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