Politico is reporting this morning that an anonymous source has told them that Governor Rick Perry attended the Fix-A Gay (FAG) school founded by Michele Bachmann's husband Marcus Bachmann. Suspicion is rampant that the information came from the Bachmann camp although the gay rumor has been around for awhile.
Governor Perry's office was quick to respond. A spokesman issued this statement: "This accusation is totally false! The fact is that the Governor did have an identical twin. He was abducted at birth by gypsies and was never heard from again. The Governor has searched for years for his brother but to no avail. The mystery is now solved, and this is the last we will have to say on this matter."
An industries reporter from Politico contacted a member of the class at the Bachmann School that was there at the time of Perry's attendance. The man agreed to speak on condition of anonymity. He told Politico the following: "Yes, I was there when Perry was there but we didn't really know his name. He sure looked like the governor. We called him, The Midnight Cowboy. The man looked like a horse," he paused,"in more ways than one, if you catch my drift! I am over that stuff now, Marcus has saved my life. I do have a picture of Perry here in my locket though, if you'd care to see it! Eeew-eeee!" The reporter declined and contacted Mrs. Perry who said the following: "This is outrageous and a personal insult to all of us. Yes, Rick does look a bit like a horse" she paused, "in more ways than one if you catch my drift. Eeeew-eeeee!"
In related news, Governor Perry has canceled all of his appearances for the remainder of the week. His spokesman cited a migraine headache as the reason.