Written by Zachary Estle
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Monday, 25 July 2011

Today the Alcoholics Incognito foundation is closing it's doors on anonymous alcoholics everywhere.

A spokesman for AI said: "Fuck it, we quit, there's too many of them. It's ridiculous. And besides, only like four percent are actually even cured, it's impossible to keep this up."

Sad news for all former, current, and future alcoholics out there. This is the end of a great foundation that helped many tens of people to quite drinking. Without this great foundation, three or so people may continue drinking themselves to death.

The only thing there is left to do is to wish future alcoholics the best in fighting their habit and to say, "its bottom's up time bitches."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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