Washington, DC. President Obama today has belatedly demanded the resignation of ex-congressman Anthony Weiner due to Weiner's repeated violations of his oath of office to uphold and defend the United States Constitution.
Obama accused Weiner of waging undeclared lust against seven different women. Obama also accused Weiner of proliferation for attempting to deploy his missile everywhere. Obama additionally accused Weiner of the indiscriminate launch of his missile at millions of innocent men women and children across the globe via his Twitter feed.
Obama said,"Weiner has consistently refused to seek my approval for his various missile deployments here at home and abroad. I cannot countenance his disregard for and violation of the Constitution in that regard. It is my duty therefore to demand his resignation before initiating his impeachment for sly crimes and for violating Miss Demeanors."
At this point in his address two technicians rushed in with his teleprompters, which had been out for repairs, and set them before him.
When Obama continued his remarks he shocked the assembled reporters by calling names,"You dumb-ass. Weiner resigned months ago. You should never have gone on without me. SHUT UP! SHUT UP NOW! THIS MEANS YOU IDIOT! BARACK! ooops!" The president was then rushed off the dais by aides.