Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Saturday, 30 April 2011

Newt Gingrich and Donald Trump have introduced "Right to Wife" as part of the GOP platform in 2012.

In a joint press conference the two potential candidates made clear their intentions in going forward to a successful presidential run.

Gingrich began the press conference with this statement: "It is true that in the past I have had multiple affairs, assignations, one nighters and a few hit and runs, but I did these things because I love my country so much and was working so hard," he paused and continued, "hard being the operative word. When I become president I will be working even harder. It is, after all, the most difficult job in the world. I will not be deterred by a boring sex life for rules of engagement, so to speak, that are no longer viable in this modern world."

Trump spoke next: "Let's get this straight," he paused, "so to speak. Kennedy did it in the White House swimming pool. Lyndon Johnson did it on the top of his desk, Bill Clinton did it while talking to heads of state, and Jimmy Carter did it all by himself in the White House crapper. It is time to take these matters out from under the desk and into the light of day!"

A reporter asked Trump: "Mr. Trump, does this mean that sexual harassment will become part of the first amendment rights for all Americans if you become president?"

Trump replied: "Absolutely not! We are talking about the presidency here and, as you know, the fuck stops here!"

Reporter: "Mr. Trump, did you mean to say, the buck……

Trump interrupted: "Scuse me! You got a hearing problem?!"

Gingrich and Trump left the odium abruptly, escorted by several female aides as a gospel choir sang in the background, "We Shall Overcomb One Day!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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