Written by kslaught
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Tuesday, 16 November 2010

image for Karzai Overreacts Again
Whining About Civilian Casualties Again

Yesterday in Afghanistan, Hamid Karzai went off his medication and blasted the United States and its allies. In an embarrassing overreaction, he demanded that night raids (about 12 per night) on people's homes be ceased.

General Petraeus was understandably upset. According to anonymous U.S. sources, the President almost went too far. "He was rambling on about innocent civilians and the use of bullhorns and all that. He almost called it a terror campaign. That was a close call. Karzai dodged a CIA bullet right there."

The source continued, "Karzai sometimes suffers from the illusion that he is in charge. He has never been comfortable being a figurehead. We are working on that.

As for the killing of women and children, it happens sometimes. There is no need for Karzai to go ballistic about it. I think he is getting that message. Civilian casualties are one thing, but you don't want to upset General Petraeus. That is a serious matter."

Apologies from President Karzai are expected soon. According to our source, "The President realizes that he would not survive a day without U.S. support. He is in our pocket, so there's no need to overreact to this foolish outburst."

When asked if ordinary Afghans have trouble sleeping at night, the official said, "Quite frankly, nobody knows and nobody has ever asked. The only important thing is to root out the Taliban. Between you and me, the people don't matter."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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