Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 10 September 2010

image for Jesse James and Kat Von D Purchase A Ranch In South Texas and Name It The Blue Tattoo Ranch
A photo of the bunkhouse located on Jesse James and Kat Von D's Blue Tattoo Ranch.

SAN ANTONIO - Two of the most tattooed individuals in the entire country, Jesse James and Kat Von D, have just become the proud owners of a 3,000 acre working cattle ranch 40 miles south of San Antonio.

The ranch which formerly belonged to San Antonio Spurs guard Manu Ginobili was sold to the happy tattooed couple for $21 million.

The ranch comes complete with a 4,000 square foot ranch house which has five bedrooms, a family room, a game room, a romance room that will easily hold three people, plus a full-sized basketball court outside by the landing strip.

Ginobili purchased the ranch from George Strait two years ago so his family would have a nice quiet place to stay when they came up to visit from Argentina.

The ranch is also equipped with a state-of-the-art automatic cattle branding machine that can brand up to 13 cattle per minute.

Jesse and Kat are thrilled and pointed out that it will be good for them to have a place where they can go and not have to worry about the media and paparazzi asking them all of these silly questions such as "Jesse which is your least favorite tattoo?" "Kat of all the tattoos that you have including the six on your ass which one does Jesse like the most?" and "Jesse are you planning on lasering out the tattoo on your beer belly that shows your ex-wife Sandra Bullock holding her Oscar for Best Actress?"

In a related story. Sandra Bullock has reportedly told Ellen DeGeneres that in keeping with her 'Girl Kissing Theme' she has really been fantasizing about kissing one of this year's Dancing With The Stars contestants, The Hills' Audrina Patridge.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 1?

5 25 3 12

Go to top