DULUTH, GEORGIA (AP) Jennifer Wilbanks was supposed to get married to John Mason this weekend, but instead got on a Greyhound bus and traveled across the country. "I always liked those long trips on the Greyhound," says Jennifer. "My family is pretty well-off and they always travel by plane, but I like Greyhound. Sitting for hours and hours on a cramped bus gives me time to sort out things in my life. I was supposed to get married to John Mason and have a big wedding with hundreds of guests and 14 bridesmaids and 14 groomsmen, but I chickened out and ran. I've always been pretty good at running."
John Mason was left in Duluth this past week having no idea what happened to his pretty fiancé and was being hounded by the police to take a lie detector test to clear him from suspicion of foul play. "Now I don't know if Jennifer was afraid of big weddings or if she was just not wanting to marry me. I just don't understand who wouldn't want to marry into a family of lawyers?"
Jennifer's father, Harris Wilbanks spoke to reporters after hearing that his daughter was found alive in Albuquerque. "This is costing me a bundle! I laid out all that money for flowers, the caterer, the band, the gown, and a million other things. I won't be able to get a dime back . And to top it off, I'll probably have to wind up driving out to *&^%(%# Albuquerque to pick Jennifer up. I probably ought to just leave her there and make her take the bus home!"
At Greyhound company headquarters, officials were busy this morning trying to come up with a TV ad to capitalize on all the publicity. "We've contacted Jennifer Willbanks and she has agreed to appear in a series of TV ads for Greyhound. We're thinking about having her shown in a fancy wedding gown on one of our buses. We think we can work in a shot of her going down the aisle and then into the little bathroom at the back of the bus. We're not sure if we can contract with John Mason to appear in the ads. Jennifer is going to be the new focal point for our Greyhound Bus advertising campaign."