Written by madcaplaughs
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Topics: Hollywood, Holiday

Thursday, 23 December 2004

HOLLYWOOD "The Passion of the Chrizzle", the newest movie by film-auteur Spike Lee has stirred quite a sensation this holiday season. So far, six southern states - including Oklahoma and Georgia - have banned the release of the film in its theatres due to issues generated by the "racial context" of the film.
The film, which depicts the last hours of Jesus Christ, has angered the Vatican with its cast of predominately African-American actors, including Mario Van Peebles, who plays the titular role as the Chrizzle. The roster also includes Sidney Poitier as the disciple Peter and Martin Lawrence as John. Vivica A. Fox and Halle Berry star as well, playing the Virgin Mary and Mary "Missy" Magdelene respectively.
The film has spawned considerable controversy for its portrayal of the film's storyline. For instance, the twelve disciples of the Chrizzle's following include all African-Americans, with the exception of Judas Iscariot, who is portrayed by John Travolta, whom producers say "is just about the whitest actor in our midst." Also, the Roman Army is portrayed by a predominately white cast and the oppressed Jews were cast with certain minorities.
The plot has generated considerable resentment as well. For example, the Last Supper scene comprises mostly of a feast of Colt .45 malt liquor and Popeye's Fried Chicken. Also, throughout the film the Chrizzle wears a bandanna of gold, with the lettering "#1 Son" emblazoned on it. Jerusalem, the prevalent setting of the story, is portrayed as a run-down inner-city ghetto.
"This film is an absolute travesty to the Christian community," says Reginald von Hapsburg, archbishop of the Atlanta diocese. "Despite the fact that Jesus Christ lived in the Middle East, everyone knows that Our Lord and Savior is, in fact, a white man."
The film has also angered independent Christian organizations such as F.R.E.A.K. (Friends Revolving Enthusiastically Around Khrist). Jeff Jerome, spokesperson of the organization, calls the film the "sickest, most deprived machination ever devised by Hollywood," insisting that it lacked "poor taste" and "quite frankly, has pretty sh---y editing," adding that "anybody who pays eleven bucks to see this film is just about as retarded as I am."
However, the NAACP has called the film a "landmark accomplishment" in advocating civil-rights in the film industry. "First it was Lord of the Rings, and then it was Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow," says Kweisi Mfume, president of the organization. "When will the world realize that race is not an issue in the concept of faith? Who knows, maybe Jesus was a black man. I mean, our jazzy gospel music blows that holy-chanting brouhaha choir music outta the water any day, sucka."
When asked about the alleged copyright infringement of his "religiously accurate" film of nearly the same name, "The Passion of the Christ," Mel Gibson was quoted as saying, "Hey, good for Spike. Maybe this will get his career back. Have you ever even seen ‘25th Hour'? I mean, Jesus Chrizzle…ha ha ha!"

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