Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Wednesday, 10 March 2010

image for "Don't Ask Don't Tell" Proposed for US Congress

As the nations capitol was rocked by the news of the behavior of Congressman Eric Massa (D-N.Y., a Democratic Congressman has proposed a bill that would duplicate the military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" law for members of the US Congress.

A Democratic Congressman speaking on the condition of anonymity said, "Something has to be done. After Larry Craig, Mark Foley, and now Eric Massa, we need to know when it's safe to go the men's room. We had heard that Congressman Massa's office is referred to as the Bunny Ranch by other staffers but hadn't paid much attention. We hope that this will be a non partisan effort."

Another of the Dem Congressmen attending the meeting shouted out, "Better blatant, than latent."

The spokesman retorted, "Oh shut up Barney," and ended the meeting.

The AP is reporting that one of Massa's ex-staffers agreed to speak off the record. "I should have known," he said. "When Massa interviewed me for the job, I was surprised that he did the interview himself. I was so excited about getting the job, I guess I didn't listen closely. I thought he said, If you want to get ahead, this is the place for you. Now I realize he said, If you want to give some head, this is the place for you. Then he said, are you a friend of Dorothy's?" Dorothy who, I said. My bad."

The reporter asked the staffer what he was going to do now, now that he was out of work. The staffer gave him a sly wink and said, "I hear the Vatican has some openings."

In other related news from the capitol, rumors are flying that Congresswoman Michele Bachmann of Minnesota is actually a cross dresser and was formerly a tight end for the Minnesota Vikings.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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