Written by queen mudder
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Thursday, 14 January 2010

image for Another Simon Cowell DNA secret shattered as Victoria Beckham joins American Idol gravy train
An 'over-botoxed Xanax-fueled scowl-of-the-year' award contender

New York - (Faux News): Last week he laughed off DNA swab reports that he'd fathered desperate wannabe celeb Cheryl Tweedy Cole.

And today Simon Cowell is equally nonchalant as another 'secret' daughter joined him on the American Idle (sic) gravy train on the US prime time slot.

A vapid and skeletal Victoria Beckham sat on the show's judging panel yesterday, her once wide-eyed gamin features a contender for 'over-botoxed Xanax-fueled scowl-of-the-year' award.

US media critics rounded on a 'haunted and bewildering' appearance that has failed to mature gracefully from the knockout early Spice Girl days of the 90s.

"A triumph of low IQ and massive self-promotion over central casting guidelines," is how celebwatch site LA FagHagSlagMag put it.

"Clinging on to the last vestiges of has been stardom," the site's Dave Skank added.

"The more the US viewers see her the less anybody wants a repeat performance.

"Basically she's all but joined Heather Mills McCartney on the Self Preservation Society's Dancing On Thin Ice makeover special."

David Beckham is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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